Strange Happenings
by Tigers and Dragons
Summary: Strange things are happening in Konoha: Hinata makes her move, Kiba has been jumped, Tenten lays a trap, Neji apologizes, Sasuke is crying, Anko is committed, there are Hyugas dancing in the streets and Naruto proves that pickup lines DO get the girl.
1. In the beginning

**Standard Disclaimer.**

* * *

**Chapter 1: In the beginning, or around breakfast time...**

* * *

"Sweetheart, I love you so much."

_Whoa._

_Hold on._

_What the hell?_

Sakura was a romantic, true, but she'd given up on ever hearing those words directed towards her.

Especially when they were uttered by Uchiha Sasuke.

"Uh, Sakura?"

Sakura crouched down and began muttering under her breath. Then she shot up and yelled, "Release!"

"Sakura?"

"Release!"

"Sakura, it isn't a genjutsu."

Sakura eyed him before leaning over and poking him.

"Hey?"

"Well, it can't be Lee: no ninjutsu." Then her eyes gleamed and she smirked.

"'Sakura, what are you thinking?"

"Naruto, you baka! I'm going to kill you!"

"No, Sakura, it's me. Sasuke!" He braced himself for impact, opening his eyes timidly when she didn't make contact.

Her fist had stopped three inches from his face.

"Sakura?"

She scratched her chin as she looked him over.

"Uh, Sakura? You're making me nervous."

"That must be it!" She cried out as a revelation unfolded in her head. She grabbed him by the back of the collar and rushed off to the hospital.

* * *

"And we should be reorganizing the rosters to cover…"

Bang!

"Shishou, I need your help!"

Sakura charged into the room, still dragging Sasuke behind her.

"What seems to be the problem?" Tsunade asked, as Shizune peered around Sakura at the poor young man lying limply on the floor.

"It's Sasuke! There's something wrong with him!" Sakura stated emphatically as she swung him around in front of her.

Sasuke looked up from the floor and whimpered pitifully, "Help me, PLEASE!"

"Caught you off-guard, didn't she?" Tsunade smirked at him as his head fell back to the floor. She refocused on Sakura and asked, "What's wrong with him?"

"He said he loved me!" Sakura stated, as if that explained everything.

"Maybe he does." Shizune offered, still concerned over the fact that Sasuke looked like he'd been dragged across the city by a herd of cattle.

Sakura snorted and crossed her arms, "Really Shizune, this is Uchiha Sasuke we're talking about. You know, the emotionless, egotistical prick who would kill a girl for touching him."

Sasuke stirred on the floor, drawing the attention back to him momentarily.

"Sakura, the only thing that I can see wrong with him is that he looks like he's been trampled. What did you do to the poor boy?"

"Well, I was worried, so I rushed here as quickly as I could." Sakura said looking at the floor and shuffling nervously. "I can't help it that he wouldn't stay on his feet."

"You know, now that you mention it," Shizune said thoughtfully, one finger tapping her cheek. "Kakashi was acting a little weird today too."

"What do you mean?" Tsunade asked, though half her attention was focused on trying to make out the source of the yelling outside her window.

"Well, when I left for work today…"

* * *

**FLASHBACK**

* * *

_Shizune opened her door to find a Kakashi on the door step, arm raised, about to knock on the door. She took a step back. Not because Kakashi, himself, made her nervous but his appearance today was a little off._

_He was standing there, hair sticking up in limp spikes, left eye covered, mask on. That was normal, but from the shoulders down, it was definitely not normal._

_He was wearing a black bathrobe with a pink fluffy lining and pink fluffy slippers._

_Shizune stared at him._

"_Yo._"_ He greeted her, pulling his arm back to wave._

"_K-Kakashi?_"

"_Shizune, I'm in the mood for a little something, R-rated. Just thought I'd stop by, see if you wanted any…_"

"_Uh…_"

"_Kakashi!_"_ came a yell from down the street, and Anko came striding up._

"_Anko! Hey you._"_ Kakashi greeted her._

"_What the hell are you doing? Why are you bothering Shizune in that get-up?_"

_Kakashi stepped down off the step, so he was an equal distance between the two women, his robe gaping open at the front, for a brief moment._

"_Well, I was going to come see you next…_"_ he said cheerfully, before turning back to Shizune, _"_You don't mind, do you?_"

_Shizune stared at him in shock and confusion. She still had no idea what was happening._

"_You should have seen me first!_"_ Anko growled, taking a hold of Kakashi's arm and dragging him off in the direction of her house._

"_Excellent!_"_ Kakashi cried, _"_I'll see you later, Shizune._"

"_No, you won't!_"_ Anko smirked,_

**

* * *

**

**PRESENT**

* * *

"And then they disappeared around the corner." Shizune finished.

"EWWWWW!" Sakura wrinkled her nose at the thought of her sensei doing anything dirty. She knew about the books, but she didn't want to think about what he did after…

"That _is_ interesting. Can anyone else hear yelling?" Tsunade said, standing up and walking to the window.

Shizune and Sakura joined her there, leaving poor Sasuke unconscious and twitching on the floor. They stared out the window.

On the street leading up to the tower, they could make out the figure of one Hiashi Hyuga, and a fair number of the Hyuga elders.

They were dancing.

The Tango, actually.

"What on earth is going on today?" Tsunade groaned.

* * *

MEANWHILE: At Ichiraku's

Naruto slurped down his third bowl of ramen. He knew it was important for him to start the day with a decent meal. So he raised his hand and ordered another two bowls.

"Good morning Naruto." A semi-familiar voice said next to him.

"Good morning," Naruto replied cheerfully turning to face the newcomer, "Hinata?"

Hinata stood in front of him, her form-covering jacket nowhere to be seen. Instead, she wore a close fitting black shirt that outlined everything she had to offer. And she was offering.

"Naruto." She smiled at him.

"You look well today." He grinned.

"I feel wonderful." She said, with a suggestive tone.

Naruto shrugged it off. This was Hinata. She just wasn't that sort of girl.

"Do you want some ramen?" he asked, turning back to his bowl and taking a mouthful.

"Oh, yes." Hinata replied. Then she grabbed his collar and swung him round to face her. She kissed him, full on the lips, pushing her tongue into his mouth. She explored his mouth, swirling the ramen around before sucking it out, smirking as she pulled back and swallowed.

Naruto stared up at her, dazed by the sudden invasion of his face and the loss of his ramen. She still had a hold of his collar and she looked down at him greedily.

"I want some more." She purred.

"H-Hinata?"

She swooped down, slanting her mouth over his and invading his mouth again. This time Naruto reacted, their tongues battling for possession of his mouth.

"Ahem!"

They broke apart for air, more than anything else. Naruto looked sheepishly at Ayame, who was holding his other bowl of ramen with a questioning look on her face.

"Do you want this, or are you having Hinata for breakfast?"

"Uh… well…" Naruto scratched the back of head, one hand coming up to point at Hinata, about to say, "She started it", but the hand gesture was misinterpreted.

"Oh, Naruto!" Hinata swooped down onto him again, not kissing this time. She hugged his head to her ample chest and squealed in excitement.

"Hinata!"

Naruto blushed and started squirming, (though it didn't really help him), because that was Neji's voice he heard.

"Yes, Neji?" Hinata called to her cousin, not releasing Naruto an inch.

"Have you seen Tenten? She's hiding from me." Neji stated as he walked up to the ramen stand. His hair was disheveled and his shirt was open, showing more skin than was usual.

"Just wait." Hinata activated her byakugan (because hers has a larger range than Neji's.) and scanned the village. She quickly caught sight of Tenten inching her way up the Hokage tower, on the outside, in a sheltered corner between two buildings.

"She's climbing up the outside of the Hokage tower on the western side, in the corner near the Academy." Hinata stated.

"Oh, thank you. Carry on." Neji left the stand at a run and quickly disappeared down the street.

"Uh, H-Hinata? C-Can you let go now?" Naruto asked nervously, though he was extremely relived that Neji hadn't killed him.

"I'm so sorry, Naruto!" Hinata let him sit up. "I'm just so excited to see you!"

Naruto blushed and scratched his hair again, trying to think of something to say.

"So. Uh, I'm not doing anything today. Do you want to do something?"

Hinata excitedly leaned in again, her mouth next to his ear. A thin trail of blood flowed from Naruto's nose as Hinata whispered all of the things she wanted to do to him, with him, for him.

"H-HINATA!" he blushed darker than Hinata ever had, while she smirked down at him.

"What da ya think, stud?" she asked seductively.

"Are you really Hinata?" Naruto asked, a little concerned that the shy girl had any knowledge of things in Jiraiya's realm.

"Come and find out." She said, taking his hand and leading him out into the street.

"I think we should make him pay before he eats." Ayame grumbled, as Naruto skipped out on his bill.

* * *

"_Tenten_."

The sing-song voice floated on the wind, followed by a giggle, and the bun-haired kunoichi froze.

"_Tenten_."

She bit her lip, as she heard it again; her name being sung out by a voice she knew so well. But today, she had no idea who he was.

"Hello Tenten." The voice said right next to her ear.

Tenten shrieked and let go of the wall, plummeting down to the ground. She did a back flip, landing in a crouch before sprinting away from the building.

"Tenten! Why are you running? It's only me!"

"Go away, Neji!" She yelled over her shoulder, taking a sharp left when he appeared in front of her.

She ran down the alleyway, bursting out the other end into the street currently full of tango-dancing Hyugas. She shrieked and began ducking and weaving through the crowds, even as Neji arrived on the curb.

"Tenten!" He called, standing on tiptoes, trying to catch sight of her in the gyrating mass of his family members. He saw a flash of red and took off, pushing through the elders after it.

"Oh, I say!"

"Young people today!"

"So rude!"

And many other comments were aimed at him by the elders, as he shoved his way forward.

"Tenten!"

The pursued kunoichi grinned in her disguise, turning away from the street into another alley and heading towards the Hokage's office at the hospital.

* * *

Sasuke stirred on the floor and rolled over. He sat up, grimacing, and held his head.

"What's going on?"

He was promptly run over as Tenten raced into the room.

"Lady Hokage!"

"OOF!" Holding his stomach, Sasuke's face turned red and he keeled over, curling into the foetal position and whimpering.

Tsunade, Shizune and Sakura turned from the window.

"Yes, Tenten, what is it?"

"It's Neji!" she began.

"Yes?"

Tenten blanched as she turned to find Neji leaning against the door frame, a sexy smirk on his face.

"Tenten, you've been very naughty today." Neji crooned as he stepped toward her.

"N-Neji, j-just w-wait!" Tenten backed up slowly, as Neji advanced on her, heedless of their audience.

"Tenten." He smirked again, steadily closing the distance between them.

"N-Neji!"

"Tenten!" Neji's face said, "You know you want to. Why are you fighting?", which was a lot for his usually expressionless face to say, but some how he managed it. Tenten looked like a small animal caught in a trap.

The three medical nin stepped out of the way as Tenten backed up toward the window.

"N-Neji." She said nervously as her back hit the windowsill. Neji smirked, thinking he'd finally caught her. Then she whipped out eight kunai and flung them at him, before jumping out the window and racing away over the rooftops.

Neji dove out of the way, and Tenten's kunai struck the wall, embedded in the masonry. Then Neji leapt up and out the window after her. The three medics crowded round the window to watch as Tenten headed for a safe haven and Neji gained on her. Sakura was ready to chase after them to see the end result when everyone's attention was brought back to the room and the groaning Uchiha on the floor.

* * *

**So, what do you think? Interesting enough for a second chapter? Want an explanation? Second chapter coming soon (maybe) XD**


	2. There was a village

**Chapter 2: There was a village, full of crazy ninja...

* * *

**

As the three medics knelt around the moaning Uchiha, Tenten raced across the roofs of Konoha with Neji in pursuit behind her.

"Just give in, Tenten! Let me hold you!" Neji called, as he chased her effortlessly.

"You're acting weird, Neji. Just stop!" Tenten yelled over her shoulder, her fringe whipping in her eyes. She was jerked backwards as he grabbed her arm. (And that's why no one should run like ninjas!) Turning her to face him, Neji wrapped his arms around his teammate and pulled her into his chest.

"I have you now." He murmured, eyes mostly closed as he ran his nose along her cheek.

"Neji, I…" Tenten was cut off as he captured her lips with his, forcing her into a passionate kiss that tore her breath away. Then he keeled over as she raised her knee.

"I'm sorry, Neji." She gasped, red-faced. "I really am, but I can't take advantage of you like this."

Neji curled up on the rooftop, his hands cupping his groin as he moaned in pain. He looked up at her, tears glistening unshed in his eyes.

"I don't know what's come over you, Neji." Tenten backed away from him. Any further apologies died in her throat as Neji sat up with a smirk.

"The jūken works both ways, my dear." He purred, standing up and advancing on her again.

Tenten whirled around, fleeing the rooftop and creating multiple clones. As the clones split up, racing away in different directions, Neji chuckled.

"You can't fool me. I know which one is real."

"Really?" A clone asked, as she turned around and launched herself at Neji, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him passionately. Neji pressed himself into her, deepening the kiss, as three other clones stopped to watch, worried looks flickering on their faces. Then Neji raised an arm and dispersed the clone in a cloud of smoke. He grinned maniacally and took off after another Tenten.

In a dark room, in a small abandoned house on the outskirts of Konoha, Tenten materialized from her transportation jutsu and smirked.

"The trap is set. Bring in the prey."

* * *

Back at the hospital, Sasuke had been moved from the floor of Tsunade's office to a hospital bed. Due to concerns over his behaviour, (they were worried he'd start acting like Neji. After all, there really isn't much difference between them when they're acting themselves), Sasuke had been strapped into a bed. Sakura sat slumped in a chair on the opposite wall.

"You didn't believe me, did you?" Sasuke asked in a small voice.

Sakura looked over at him, then out the window before answering brusquely. "It's not that I doubt your affections, Sasuke. You just didn't sound like yourself. You don't usually say things like that and I found it hard to believe that you meant… Oh Kami! Are you crying?"

Sure enough, Sasuke had turned his head away from her and was sobbing into the pillow.

"Sasuke, what the hell is wrong with you today? It's like you're on estrogen tablets or something." Her eyes narrowed as she approached the other side of the bed, "Have you been raiding the medicine cabinet again?"

"NO!" He wailed at her, turning his head to the other side and sniffling.

"GAH!" She growled, pulling on her hair. "Then what have you been doing? Is this some sort of sick joke? Some weird bet you made with Naruto? Because I swear, if I find out this is just another bet to help you get into my pants, I will castrate both of you!"

Sasuke stared at her with what looked like terror before tears spilled down his cheeks. "Why are you so mean? All I'm trying to do is tell you I love you and you just keep threatening me! I'm trying to show I care! Is it so hard to believe?"

"When you're crying: YES!" Sakura cried, "Seriously Sasuke, get a hold of yourself."

Sasuke took a deep breath and swallowed. He sniffled. He looked up at Sakura and pouted, and she grimaced as snot ran down his face.

"You are a mess." She sighed as she grabbed a tissue and cleaned his face. "Honestly, Sasuke, do you have any idea why this is happening?"

He shook his head.

"None at all? Nothing you've eaten, or used? Been anywhere new recently?"

As Sasuke opened his mouth to say something, he was cut off by a loud voice from out in the hall.

"Sakura? I have another patient for you."

"Kiba?" Sakura left Sasuke's room, to find Kiba standing in the hospital hallway, shirtless, with a semi-naked, bound and gagged Hyuga Hanabi over his shoulder. "What happened?"

Kiba bounced Hanabi a little as he readjusted his hold on her, turning to show her to Sakura and inadvertently showing off the multiple large red scratches down his back. Hanabi glared at the medic, two lines of red paint across her cheeks. A feather in her hair wouldn't have looked out of place.

"She jumped me."

"What?"

"I was walking over to see Hinata this morning and suddenly I was jumped by a whole horde of Hyugas. All girls though, I think all the males are out dancing or something."

Sakura groaned, one hand over her face, as she led Kiba to an empty room. He laid Hanabi on the bed and she began struggling.

"They tried to drag me into the estate but I whistled for Akamaru and he came running. He barked a couple of times and the girls all hissed like cats and ran off. Except this one." He said looking down at Hanabi as she struggled in vain. "They'd already torn my shirt off, so I used it to tie her up. She put up a bit of a fight but she wasn't trying to get away, so I managed to grab her. Something really weird is going on today."

"You have no idea." Sakura replied as she strapped the Hyuga onto the bed. "We've already seen the dancing Hyugas, Neji's pursuing Tenten across the town in some sex-crazed state, Kakashi's doing I don't want to know what with Anko, and Sasuke's in the next room, bawling his eyes out."

"I've stopped now." Sasuke could be heard calling out to them, although the slight catch in his speech indicated otherwise.

"Sure sounds like it." Sakura muttered.

"It's just the hiccoughs." He called again, "Sakura, I need you back."

Kiba looked at her in surprise, and then followed Sakura as she returned to Sasuke's room, grumbling quietly.

Kiba jumped back, almost knocking himself out on the doorway, "Oh, shit man! What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I just need a tissue." Sasuke huffed, as more snot ran down his face. He looked up at Sakura with a hopeful expression on his face. "You're going to stay, aren't you?"

"I'm scarred for life. Man, I don't think I can respect you after this." Kiba said one hand massaging his forehead, the other bracing him against the door, as Sasuke began to tear up again.

Sakura pushed Kiba out of the room and dragged the curtain around Sasuke's bed. "I think you should go back to the Hyugas, see if Hinata can help. She might know what's wrong." Then she disappeared into Sasuke's room and closed the door.

Kiba left the hospital running.

* * *

Hinata sat Naruto down on her bed and stood in front of him with a saucy smile on her face. Naruto was quietly watching her, waiting to see what she would do next. He was still slightly dazed from the incident at Ichiraku's.

She reached out a hand and touched his cheek and he leaned into the touch. She trailed her fingers over his cheek and down to his jaw line as she leant down and kissed him. It was a gentle kiss to begin with but she soon had him on his back, her fingers entwined in his hair, his hands on her hips. He gingerly raised his hands, running them along her spine and he deepened the kiss, moving up the bed so that she was lying on top of him.

She pulled back slightly, unzipping his jacket and pulling it off. Next to go was his shirt, as she planted soft kisses down his neck, across his collar bone and over his chest. She sat up astride him with a mischievous grin as she removed her shirt. His eyes widened at the sight of her body, and he reached up to touch her gently.

Her grin changed to a soft smile as she leaned down to continue exploring him with her kisses. He raised her head and their lips met again, this time in a passionate kiss. So in-depth was it, that they barely noticed the door to her room banging open.

"Oh no! Hinata!"

Naruto's eyes opened as Hinata collapsed on top of him, unconscious from a blow to the back of the neck.

"Kiba! What the hell, man?"

"I'm sorry to interrupt but somethings wrong with Hinata." Kiba said dragging his teammate off his friend.

"Why? Because she likes me?" Naruto growled in frustration and anger.

"Dude, that is so not the issue right now. Besides, Hinata has liked you since the academy."

"Huh?"

"Didn't you think it was weird that Hinata was acting like this?" asked Kiba as he rolled Hinata into a sheet and tossed Naruto his shirt. "Usually she'll faint before she gets anywhere near you."

"I suppose…" Naruto shrugged, still not quite understanding the situation.

"The Hyugas are all acting out of character at the moment. There's a parade of them showing off some weird dance in front of the Hokage's tower."

"Really? I've got check that out! Is Neji there?" Naruto's eyes gleamed at the thought of the blackmail material he could glean from the incident.

"No, Sakura said he's out chasing Tenten down."

"Oh, yeah, I remember." Naruto's shoulder's sagged in defeat.

"And Sasuke's at the hospital. And man, not even you could believe it!" Kiba said, as he heaved Hinata's sheet-wrapped body over his shoulder and led Naruto out of the Hyuga estate. Both boys ignored the squeals and grunts as the ANBU subdued a number of Hyuga females who had started a harem of bound and terrified men, villagers and shinobi alike.

"What's wrong with Sasuke?" Naruto asked as they headed towards the hospital.

"I can't describe it. You really need to see it for yourself."

* * *

"I can't believe it!" Naruto said in shock disbelief. He stood, looking into Sasuke's room at the hospital as the Last Uchiha wrapped his arms around Sakura and cried into her hair. She'd taken the restraints off him when it had become clear he wasn't exhibiting the same traits as the Hyugas or Kakashi. Sakura sat there, with a pained look on her face and sighed.

"I told you." Kiba said, patting Naruto on the back as a show of comfort or support or whatever. Both shinobi turned, then, as a loud voice heralded the arrival of Sarutobi Konohamaru.

"Where's Hanabi? Oh, hey boss!"

Kiba silently pointed to the next room, where both Hyuga sisters now lay strapped to the hospital beds and mildly sedated. Konohamaru rushed passed them, into the room and threw himself at Hanabi's bed.

"Oh, my precious! What have they done to you?" he wailed. Kiba and Naruto looked at each other from the doorway.

"Does he usually act like that?"

Naruto shook his head, "He sounds sort of like the pervy sage going after Granny Tsunade."

Both shinobi slapped themselves in the face when Konohamaru continued, "Why didn't you jump _me_?"

* * *

In another part of Konoha, several streets over from the parade of Hyugas (who were slowly being led towards the hospital) Kakashi stepped out of a house, stretched, readjusted his black and bright pink robe and began humming as he wandered down the street.

"Hatake? Did you just leave Mitarashi Anko's house?" Shiranui Genma called.

"Hmm?" Kakashi turned to face him and the two other men who were with him, Namiashi Raidō and Yamashiro Aoba. "Oh, yes. Left her sleeping like the angel she is."

Disregarding the disbelief on their faces, Kakashi continued, "Have you guys seen Shizune? Or Kurenai? Either of the Inuzukas? The girls, that is!"

Jaws dropped to the ground but the shock was quickly shaken off.

"Are you feeling okay?"

"Oh, I'm fine." Kakashi waved off their concern, "Just a little peckish!" His eye crinkled at his little joke and he turned to continue on his quest. As soon as he wasn't looking, the three guys chased after him, crash-tackling him to the ground and holding him down. He was quickly tied up with the sash from his robe (and thankfully he _was_ wearing shorts beneath it) and they rolled him over.

"Alright Hatake, whatever you've got or had done, spill! No way does one man knock out Anko!"

* * *

Neji stood in the street, silently inspecting the small house across the road. He could see Tenten's chakra inside; he'd tracked several clones to this area. He knew it was a trap. He shrugged. As good as she was, Tenten couldn't catch him with a trap.

He could see through them.

He smirked at that thought.

He landed on the roof and swung down to enter through the second floor window. Balancing on the sill, he scanned the room before opening the window and sliding into the room.

Suddenly his senses told him there were more people in the house, but his eyes told him the source of the chakra came from downstairs. Moving silently, Neji positioned himself above the chakra source. Then he punched through the floor…

And found himself suspended, by his feet, his face about two feet from the floor.

"Neji. So nice of you to drop in!" Tenten smirked as she seated herself cross-legged on the floor in front of his face. She was out of reach, even if he had been able to move his arms.

"That was a lame joke, Tenten." Neji said, struggling to free his arms, which were trapped against his sides. In fact the only thing he could move was his head. "Don't worry, I still love you."

"If I was sure of your sincerity, Neji, I would return the sentiment."

"Of course I mean it!" Neji cried out, then he smirked and dropped his voice to a husky whisper, "I'd mean it even more if you were naked."

Tenten tried (and failed) to suppress the little tremor that ran through her. She took a deep breath, her eyes closed, as she tried to calm herself. When she opened her eyes, Neji was still smirking at her. He'd seen that shiver and knew exactly what had caused it. She closed her eyes again, but, unfortunately, she couldn't close her ears.

"_Tenten._" He whispered, in the same tone. He let out a little chuckle and a shiver ran up her spine. "_Tenten._"

Her eyes snapped open and she snarled, a primal, animalistic sound. Neji continued to smirk.

"That's it. I like you feisty!"

Tenten rolled her eyes. "Yeah, I can see that." Her eyes flicked up then back to his face.

"I'm not ashamed." Neji replied, squirming slightly to try and get closer to her. "Come on, Tenten, you know you want it just as much as I do." He was pleading now.

"Do I?" Tenten shook her head, "Neji, I have no intention of letting you out while you continue to act like this. It isn't normal behaviour for you." She raised her head to look at him earnestly, "What is wrong with you today?"

In answer, Neji took a deep breath and held it, his face gradually turning red. Tenten looked at him in concern.

"Neji, what are you doing? Neji? Let it out!" She moved onto her knees, closer to him, reaching for his face. And still he held his breath.

"Neji! Breathe, Neji!"

He was starting to go purple.

She was reluctant to touch him. The trap she'd set would unravel quickly if she touched it. He'd get out, and she was just too tired to run anymore.

"NEJI!"

His eyes rolled up as his face became tinged with blue. There was nothing for it. Tenten drew back her hands.

Then she punched him in the side of the head.

The momentum of the punch left him swinging from the ceiling and she had to reach to grab him. He was now unconscious but at least he was breathing again.

"I'm sorry, Neji." She whispered, as she gently laid him on the floor as the trap gave way. He stirred slightly and she hit him again, mildly panicked.

"Well, I guess I better get you to the hospital." She sighed, producing two clones and picking him up. "At least you aren't struggling." She said grimly and they headed for the hospital.

* * *

**AH HAH, still keeping you hanging. Don't worry, all will be revealed in the third chapter, maybe ;)**

**Also, thanks for the reviews, _shadie kid, mistressinwaiting, Dark Vampress, The Unknown Twinkie, y-in-flame, MajorPain206, eternalsmiles_. They made me laugh.  
**


	3. That was attacked

**Chapter Three: That was attacked, by someone quite stupid...

* * *

**

"Is everything in place?" The cloaked man whispered.

The man he addressed was six foot tall, and two foot wide, with a single line of black hair running up the centre of his head, from a prominent widow's peak, to the nape of his neck and hanging to his waist. He had a scar down his right cheek and was missing three teeth. His clothes were stained and ragged from living rough but his weapons, assorted throwing knives and a four foot long scimitar, were extremely sharp. He looked down at the hooded figure of his employer and spat on the ground.

"Yeah. It's done." He growled.

"You doubt me?" came the sinister whisper from beneath the hood.

"Hmph." The man grunted.

"The shipment arrived and has been distributed. If your men are in position, there will be no problems."

The man grunted again and left the hooded man standing in the trees. The man in the cloak continued to watch the gate of the city.

"Soon, it will all be mine!"

* * *

"Sakura, my eyes hurt." Sasuke whined.

Sakura rolled her eyes and shifted position again. After Sasuke had cried himself to sleep, she'd managed to pry his hands off her and had strapped him back onto the bed. She didn't care if he wasn't a flight risk. She didn't want him crying all over her again. It was just too weird.

So, now she was sitting on a chair against the wall, reading a magazine. She turned the page and tried to ignore the other two occupants of the room.

"Where's Tenten?"

Sakura glanced over at Neji's bed, then quickly looked back at her magazine, a blush creeping onto her cheeks. Sasuke noticed the blush and glanced over at the other bed.

"Cut that out, Hyuga." He cried. "You're in the presence of a lady!"

"Two of them, I think." Neji smirked back.

"Take that back!" Sasuke cried again, as a tear slipped down his cheek.

"Whotcha gonna do? Cry on me?" Neji sneered.

"Alright, that's it!" Sakura said, standing up. "Sasuke, snap out of it. If I have to blow your nose again, I'm sticking a tube up it." She turned to Neji, keeping her eyes focused on his face. "Neji, stop thinking about Tenten. She doesn't want to see you."

"You lie!" Neji yelled, as Sasuke attempted to stop his nose from running.

"Don't make me sedate you again!" Sakura threatened. She pulled the curtain between them and turned to leave the room.

"Sakura?" Sasuke said in a small voice. She stopped at the end of his bed.

"What is it?"

"My eyes really hurt."

He blinked and she leaned closer as something red ran from his eyes.

"Sasuke? Is that blood?"

* * *

Tsunade stood at the entrance of the hospital, directing nurses, doctors and ANBU to various wings and wards as the Hyugas were brought in. Most of the men were sent to the psychiatrics ward, though a few just needed a rub down from pulling muscles while doing unusual exercises. The women were being sent to a wing that was relatively empty. They had to be sedated and kept separately, otherwise fights broke out.

There were also a number of young men who were slightly dehydrated and were being treated for shock. Or exhaustion.

"My lady," an ANBU officer presented a rolled up piece of paper to her.

"What's this?" She asked, unrolling it slightly.

_Uchiha Sasuke_

_Shiranui Genma_

_Hatake Kakashi_

_Nara Shikamaru_

_Inuzuka Kiba_

_Aburame Shino_

_Umino Iruka_

"It's a list of men from the village." The ANBU explained, "Apparently, these men top the desirable list."

"Where do you want these ones?" asked an ANBU as she led in two men being supported by four others.

"Izumo and Kotetsu?"

"They're on the list. A few of the women weren't content with waiting for the ones at the top." The ANBU continued and Tsunade could hear the smirk in her voice.

"What have you two been up to?" Tsunade inquired of the two chunins.

They glanced at each other and gave tired, satisfied smiles.

"Wipe those smirks off!" Tsunade growled, "Do you think their fathers or brothers are going to be happy with you when they find out?"

The smiles disappeared instantly as the possible consequences of the day's escapades hit them.

"We were raped!"

"She started it!"

"Who did?" asked Tsunade, as another three men were led in a similar state.

"Uh…"

"You don't even know, do you?"

"Well, they all kind of look the same!"

"There weren't exactly introductions!"

"There may have been more than one."

"WHAT?"

All five men looked at the floor, embarrassed and more than a little worried.

"We're full up in here." Tsunade stated, "Take them to interrogation."

Tsunade hoped the fear on their faces would help those men think in the future.

She turned back to the door as the sound of screaming was heard, increasing in volume and thus decreasing in distance.

"SOMEONE HELP US! SHE'S CRAZY!"

"RUUUUUUUUUN!"

"GET BACK HERE YOU SONS OF BITCHES!"

Looking around, Tsunade signaled to five ANBU with empty hands and led them outside to see why Anko was chasing three men who were carrying a fourth.

* * *

The two Hyuga sisters were staring at the ceiling of their room.

"Hinata?"

"Yes, Hanabi?"

"Did you… you know?"

"No. Did you?"

Hanabi sighed, "No, he fought back."

"I told you he would."

"I know."

"Hinata?"

"Yes, Hanabi?"

"Does he know?"

"I don't know." Hinata sighed. "I hope this lasts."

"Why?"

"Because I won't be able to face him if it doesn't."

"Oh."

"Hanabi?"

"Yes, Hinata?"

"What's with Konohamaru?"

Hanabi turned her head to look at the door. It was closed but she could see a face pressed up to the glass on the other side.

"I think he likes you." Hinata stated.

"I know. But I so prefer Kiba!"

There was a muffled cry from the other side of the door and the face disappeared.

"That was mean."

"I know."

"Particularly when it's not true."

"I know."

There was silence in the room again, each girl staring at the ceiling.

"Hinata?"

"Yes, Hanabi?"

"Do you know what Neji is doing?"

The door opened and both girls looked over to see who it was.

"Hello, Tenten."

"Girls. What did you give him?"

"Pardon?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Tenten eyed them both carefully, moving to stand between the two beds.

"What was it? An aphrodisiac?"

"No." both answered together.

"Whatever is wrong with Neji, he did to himself." Hinata said confidently.

Tenten snorted, "Then why are you two here? Test it on yourselves first?"

"No."

Tenten looked a little worried as she asked, "Come on guys, what's wrong with you all today? What happened?"

"My eyes hurt." Hanabi said, blinking rapidly.

"Hanabi? Oh no, Hanabi? Hinata, do you see this? HINATA?"

Tenten raced from the room, "SOMEONE HELP! THEY'RE BLEEDING IN HERE!"

* * *

"RUUUUUUUUUUUN!"

"HURRY UP! SHE'S GAINING!"

"If you don't mind, could you put me down?"

"SHUT IT, HATAKE! WE'RE TRYING TO SAVE YOUR LIFE!"

"GIVE HIM BACK!"

"ANKO!"

Anko stopped abruptly when her name was called. With her chest heaving and her face red, she attempted to calm down as the Hokage approached. She wanted to tear her hair out as the three men carrying Kakashi ran away.

"Lady."

"What is the meaning of this?"

"I, well… They stole Kakashi!" she finished, pointing at the men who had stopped over two hundred metres away.

"And this is your business, how?"

"They stole him from me!"

Down the street, there was a chorus of protest from the men which was silenced as ANBU appeared around them.

Tsunade put her hand on Anko's shoulder and squeezed gently. "I think you should go home, Anko. Have a bath and go to sleep."

"Not without him!" Anko mumbled, as the men were forcibly escorted closer.

"I would say 'yes' to that, but I think something's wrong with me." Kakashi said cheerfully.

"I'd say." His three friends muttered.

Tsunade looked him over. He was rumpled and his robe was dirty, but other than his clothes, he looked the same as usual.

"What do you think is wrong?" She asked.

"Well, my eyes are really sore and I seem to be crying." He said lifting his headband to reveal the Sharingan, which was spinning backwards and leaking blood.

"SHISHOU! I NEED HELP!"

* * *

"Sir, the signal has gone up."

The man nodded in acknowledgement and steeled himself to approach his employer. He wasn't scared of him, with his dark cloak and sinister voice. No, it wasn't fear that caused the bitter taste in his mouth. The man was just, so damn creepy.

"We've received the signal." He stated, walking up beside the man in the cloak.

"Excellent. Prepare to attack."

The man jerked his head in a nod and motioned to his second in command. They waited for ten minutes, until they heard confirmation of the order from all units.

"Begin."

* * *

The first Konoha knew of the attack was when a horde of screaming, sword-wielding ruffians came roaring through the city gates.

All of the gates.

At the same time.

Civilians ran screaming towards the Hokage tower. Genin were ordered to protect the civilians and _not_ go rushing off to fight. Chunin picked off stragglers before dashing away into shadows and alleyways. The Jounin were carefully funneling the main body of the attackers into the road leading to the tower, blocking off connecting streets and using illusions to ensnare any who went astray. The sounds of fighting filtered into the hospital where the entire clan of Hyugas and the only remaining Sharingan users were being given emergency treatment. And to be honest all that noise was distracting.

"Inconsiderate pigs!" Sakura muttered as she held her hands over Hinata's eyes. "Of all the times to attack, they had to choose now!"

"Maybe that was their plan all along." Hinata said.

Sakura stopped and looked down at her patient.

"Hinata, do you know why this happened?"

"No, but given the timing, I'd say it would have to be the eye drops."

"Eye drops?"

"Two weeks ago, a contingent of merchants arrived with new medicines."

"OOH! Those bastards!"

"Sakura, do you think you could…"

"Oh, sorry Hinata." Sakura healed the current bleeder within Hinata's eyes. "How's that? Can you see?"

Hinata sat up and blinked. "Yes, I can see. How about we go do something about the noise."

Sakura smirked, "Yes, let's."

* * *

"Shishou, it's the eye drops." Sakura stated.

"Ah, then we'll need a sample to create an antidote."

"Leave it to us." Sakura and Hinata smirked together.

They turned to leave and found Kiba and Naruto blocking the hallway.

"Why are you guys here? Get out there and defend the village!"

The two boys looked at them, then at each other and shrugged.

"Ladies first." They bowed.

Sakura and Hinata walked passed them, and Sakura set out her plan.

"Hinata is going to the Estate to collect a sample of the eye drops. Naruto, you protect her. Kiba, you're with me."

"What will we be doing?"

Sakura walked through the door of the hospital and surveyed the fighting in the street. "We'll be stopping this noise, so Shishou can make the antidote."

"Alright, let's get started!" Kiba whistled and Akamaru bounded up to him. Sakura grinned at them as she pulled on her gloves.

Hinata and Naruto slipped away as Sakura walked down the steps and Kiba and Akamaru began their jutsu, dual piercing fang.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Naruto asked as he and Hinata roof hopped across town toward the Hyuga estate.

"I'll be fine, so long as I don't use the Byakugan. I didn't use the eye drops very much. I prefer to make my own medicine."

They landed at the gate of the estate as a loud cry went up from the centre of town.

"Bet you wish you were over there." Hinata said quietly, slipping through the gates and leading the way into the main house.

"My mission is to protect you." Naruto replied, "Believe it!"

"Right."

Hinata stopped at the door to her bedroom.

"Just wait here. I won't be long."

She went in and closed the door, leaving Naruto standing in the hallway. He took a step back and looked around, humming softly. He quickly became bored.

"Hinata?" he called.

There was no answer, but there was a thump on the other side of the door.

Pushing it open, Naruto raced into the room to find Hinata struggling with two men.

"Naruto!"

"Naruto?"

"Uzumaki?"

"BELIEVE IT!" Naruto ran at the men, who leapt off Hinata and cowered in the corner.

"Please don't hurt us! We surrender!"

"Huh?"

"We surrender!"

"Why?"

"The Boss said you wouldn't be here!"

"Yeah, if we'd known you were here, we would have pulled out!"

Naruto stared at them, brow furrowed as he tried really hard to understand what they were talking about.

"Why did you attack Konoha then?" asked Hinata as she stood up, "This is where Naruto lives, you know."

"This is Konoha?" they both looked stunned.

"How could you _not_ know that?" asked Hinata in disbelief.

"Hey lady, we just follow orders."

"Oh, I see. You're scared of me!" Naruto exclaimed. "HOORAY! I HAVE A REPUTATION!"

Hinata smiled at him as Naruto danced around the room in celebration. The two intruders tried to make themselves invisible.

"Naruto?"

"Yes, Hinata?"

"I love you!"

Naruto stopped and looked at her, completely stunned. Then he grinned and pulled her in for a kiss. The two men in the corner definitely wished they were invisible now.

"Come on, Hinata! Let's get that stuff back to the hospital so we can fix the teme and I can rub his face in it!"

"But," Hinata stopped him, "what about those two?"

Naruto produced four clones, who gathered the two men up and dragged them out the window and off to Interrogation.

"Come on, Hinata."

Hand in hand, the two raced back to the hospital.

* * *

"Hey, Granny! We got that stuff for you!" Naruto's voice echoed down the corridor and Tsunade grimaced.

"Brat, show some restraint! This is a hospital!" She yelled back at him. The patients in between winced and held their ears.

Naruto grinned sheepishly, scratching the back of his head. Beside him, Hinata stared up at him with hearts in her eyes. Then she squealed and jumped on him, hugging him around the neck. Naruto fell over, taking her with him. Tsunade watched as Naruto sat up, Hinata still draped around his neck, and for a change, it was Naruto's face that was red.

"So, Naruto got it too?" Sasuke said, coming out of his room with a blanket around his shoulders.

"If you mean, an adoring girlfriend, then yes." Tsunade said with a grin.

"Hn. Typical." Sasuke turned away.

"You're sounding more yourself." Tsunade said, following him back into his room. Then he turned to look at her and her smile dropped. "Oh."

She helped him back into bed, pulling the blanket up and tucking it around him as he sobbed into his pillow.

"Naruto, give me the eye drops. The Uchiha's gonna ruin another pillow."

* * *

One hour later, the invading force found themselves milling around in front of the tower. They couldn't move forward. They were closed in at the sides. The pressure from behind stopped them from retreating. They weren't making any progress with their invasion.

There was a shout as two men appeared in the middle of the throng. The Boss, the tall man with the mohawk and the pony tail, glanced around his men and grimaced. Beside him, the cloaked man stared forward.

Then he laughed.

It was the type of laugh that sent chills down your spine and made your stomach churn. The type of laugh that twisted your facial features as your body struggled not to fall down and puke. Without saying a word, everyone within twenty feet of the cloaked man moved as far away as possible. Some of them couldn't control themselves and there was the sound of retching.

Ignoring the movement and the growing smell of vomit and stomach acid, the cloaked man moved forward. The crowd parted before him as he continued to laugh.

He reached the forward ranks of his invading army and hit the invisible wall that kept them stationary. In front of them, on the broad steps of the Tower, there were a number of kneeling shinobi. It was them keeping the wall up. The cloaked man looked from left to right, then he spied one of the people he was looking for.

"Haruno Sakura. You've grown up well."

Sakura jumped off the building she was standing on and landed five metres in front of the man.

"Yakushi Kabuto. You've grown ugly."

"Now, now," The Kabuto said, removing the cape and dropping it, to reveal his features, silver hair streaked through with black, swathes of white scaled skin cutting across his face, his black eyes lined with purple. "There's no need to be rude."

"It may be rude, but it's the truth."

"Sakura," Kabuto started in a warning tone.

Sakura cut him off, "What are you doing here, Kabuto?"

"I've come home."

Sakura snorted.

"You don't believe me?"

"Most people don't return home with an army at their back."

"Pardon me, Lady." The Boss interrupted as he walked up next to Kabuto.

Kabuto hissed at the intrusion while Sakura raised an eyebrow.

"We are willing to let you have him. We'll go away."

"Uh huh."

Sakura glanced over her shoulder and the ninja holding the wall nodded.

"You may leave." Sakura said as she turned back to the Boss.

"Aren't you overstepping your authority?" Kabuto asked as the ruffians began filing out of the city, escorted by members of the Yamanaka clan.

"Aren't they overstepping yours?" Sakura asked back, amusement showing on her face as Kabuto's army left him behind.

"Who's in charge here?"

"Well, it certainly isn't you." Another voice stated, as fifteen ninja landed next Sakura. Kabuto gulped as he stared up at Tenten, Kiba, Shino, Genma, Choji, Sai, Shizune, Aoba, Iruka, Raidō, Shikamaru, Hana, Lee, Gai, and Yamato as they positioned themselves around Sakura and readied for battle.

"That's a little unfair, isn't it?" Kabuto croaked.

"You don't think you could handle this many?" Sakura goaded him, "Why did you attack the city?"

"Give me Sasuke and I will leave."

"Why would we do that?" Shizune asked.

"Other than the obvious reason; that it would get rid of that ugly face of his?" laughed Kiba. Hana poked her brother, but smirked nonetheless.

"Sasuke is currently indisposed." Sakura stated in an even tone. "Please check back at a later date."

"Ah, so the eye drops worked." Kabuto smirked. "I must say, it was rather stupid of you to just distribute them throughout your ranks."

Sakura's face went red and several hands reached out to hold her back. "THAT'S IT! YOU AND ME. RIGHT NOW!"

Kabuto chuckled. "Why would I want to do that?"

"I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU WANT!" Sakura screamed, tearing herself out of her friends' grasps and moving towards the traitor. "I WILL BREAK YOU!"

As Sakura ran at him, Kabuto retreated, dancing out of her reach. They both ran into invisible walls. Kabuto chuckled again as Sakura shrieked her rage.

"LET HER GO!"

The shout came from the direction of the hospital, and Naruto quickly appeared.

"Granny said Sakura could handle him!"

He ran up to his teammate and gripped her shoulder. She calmed down slightly and he whispered in her ear. She nodded and he stepped away.

"Do you seriously believe that you are a match for me?" Kabuto sneered.

Sakura lowered her head and took several deep breaths. When she raised it again, she was grinning maniacally and Kabuto involuntarily took a step back, hitting the invisible wall that surrounded him.

"The question is: _do you feel lucky, punk?_"

Kabuto gulped.

"_Well, do ya?_"

The invisible wall that had been holding them penned, disappeared.

Sakura led with her right fist, aiming for his head. Kabuto flipped backwards and away to the right, bouncing off a shop front before landing on the other side of the street.

Sakura whirled round to face him as he launched himself at her, quickly performing hand signs to create chakra scalpels. Sakura jumped into the air, somersaulting to aim straight down as Kabuto appeared beneath her. Her fist hit his back, driving downwards and creating a crater in the street with his body. It disappeared in a plume of smoke.

Sakura cursed and whipped out a kunai as she turned to face the mocking laughter from further down the street. Kabuto threw his kunai at her, running down the street, leading with the blade of his fingers. Deflecting his kunai with hers, Sakura then threw three of hers. They thudded into the ground behind him as he dodged and raced forward. Sakura braced herself for impact. Kabuto smirked as he closed in.

He dipped his hand to strike her chest, only to find it blocked, within inches of his target, by her crossed wrists.

"What?"

"You're so predictable!" Sakura smirked.

Lightning fast, she twisted her wrists, wrapping her fingers around his hand. He tried in vain to pull his arm back but she had him tight. She shifted her weight, swinging her arms up above her head, swinging Kabuto up above her head.

"ARGH!" She swung him down into the ground, releasing her hold on his arm.

There was a brief moment of silence. It was broken when Kiba let out a long low whistle.

The fissure that opened at Sakura's feet stretched fifty metres back down the street. Kabuto was wedged in it, moaning and groaning and making strange, little hissing noises.

He opened his eyes and blinked as the sun's rays hit him square in the face. Then someone stepped up in front of him, blocking out the light.

"Not so tough now, are we?" Naruto grinned down at him.

There was a shout and Naruto looked aside. The next he knew, there was a scaly arm wrapped around his throat and a long purple tongue licked his cheek.

"EWWWWWW!" The gathered ninja paled with disgust as the remnants of Orochimaru took greater control of Kabuto's body and trapped Naruto in his embrace.

"SAKURA! GET HIM OFF ME! IT'S SO YUKKY!" Naruto screamed, his legs kicking in the air.

"That was gross!" Sakura wrinkled her nose. "Baka, do I have to save you all the time?"

"YUKKY!" Naruto whined, his eye twitching.

"Bring me Sasuke and I will release him!" The demand came out in a voice that was an odd mix of both Kabuto and Orochimaru. The words seemed to slither up the spines of all who heard it. Only Sakura stood still, not reacting.

"This is getting old." Sakura sighed. "Well," she lifted a finger and tapped her chin, "I suppose there's nothing for it."

Kabuto/Orochimaru raised an eyebrow in confusion.

Working quickly, Sakura sprung into action, delivering a chakra loaded punch to the arm holding Naruto. He screamed as they both flew backwards, striking the ground and bouncing and skidding along the street. Before either male (and I use that term loosely for a certain someone) could react, Sakura has high above them.

"HIYA!" She brought her foot down on the sprawled body of the village traitor, driving him into the ground in a massive crater. This time, he made no recovery.

"Sakura," Naruto groaned, raising himself, gingerly, from the ground, "Why'd you have to do that?"

Sakura shrugged, "It worked, didn't it?"

"NARUTO!"

Hinata came running down the street from the hospital. She was in such a hurry, she almost fell into the fissure. Catching her foot on the edge, she flew forward. Everyone watched in slow motion as Hinata fell down toward Naruto.

"Hinata!"

He caught her, hitting the ground with an "Oomph".

"N-Naruto! Are y-you okay?" Hinata asked, as she blushed bright red.

"I guess you fell for me again." Naruto grinned.

"Hinata! You're back to normal!" Kiba yelled, jumping in the air. Everyone crowded around the two ninja, clapping them on the back and cheering. Except Sakura, Shizune and Tenten, who had raced back to the hospital.

There was a moan from the crater and the cheering stopped.

Genma, Aoba and Raidō jumped down into the hole and dragged the still unconscious body of Kabuto/Orochimaru out.

"I guess we should lock him up now." Aoba said, as his two friends eyed the man suspiciously.

"To interrogation!" Everyone yelled, and the crowd moved off, the traitor firmly within their grasp.

* * *

**Author's Note: There you have it, the third chapter. Mystery solved. How many of you saw that coming? Congratulations to _SheldOg21_ for guessing the connection between those afflicted. And, in answer to one query, the reason why Neji wasn't breathing was, he figured out the trap would unravel and he was trying to make Tenten touch him. The silly boy should have realised she'd hit him. :D**

**Thanks for the reviews. _Animeromance luver, sasumiofjp, OxRosethornxO, mistressinwaiting, xXItachiXx, _****_SheldOg21, Yuuki-Hime, eternalsmiles, The Unknown Twinkie _and_ y-in-flame. _You guys make me laugh._  
_**


	4. Then the village went back to normal

**Chapter Four: Who was defeated and the village went back to business as usual. (Well, sort of...)**

* * *

As the crowd of ninja bore Kabuto away, still chanting, Naruto hugged Hinata closer. Or at least he tried to. Unfortunately for him, Kiba was just as overjoyed to see Hinata back to normal and had stolen his teammate away. Naruto looked around to find Kiba grinning like a madman while Hinata's face went increasingly darker. Whether this was due to embarrassment or lack of oxygen is debatable.

"Kiba, you fool! Let her go." Hana yelled, delivering a swift kick to her brother's rump to gain his attention. Kiba's hold slackened but he didn't let go.

Not immediately.

And not by choice.

As Naruto and Hana, and the few others who hadn't run off to see Kabuto tortured, watched, Kiba was mobbed by about ten teenage Hyuga girls, screaming battle cries. They were, of course, led by Hanabi.

Soon Kiba was lying on the ground, trussed up and gagged, Hinata's female cousins standing around him and glaring. His muffled yells were somehow interpreted and Hanabi squatted down next to his head and explained the situation to him.

"You probably thought you were doing the right thing, Kiba, and that's admirable. But the fact remains that you interrupted my sister before she could accomplish her life's goal."

Kiba glared up at her, growling and snarling and generally trying to declare his intentions. Hanabi smirked and stood up.

"You're going to be punished."

Hinata had been sitting on the ground, having been thrown out of the way when Kiba was ambushed, staring wide-eyed at her family members. Now she stood and tried to stop them. But before she'd moved two steps, she was stopped by twenty ANBU sent by Tsunade to round up the wayward Hyugas.

Everyone stood back as a scuffle broke out between the ANBU and the Hyuga girls, with yells of "Let me at him!" and "You haven't had your medicine yet!" abounding. Two girls broke ranks and were quickly chased down. Twenty minutes later, most of them had been subdued and led (read: dragged) away. Only Hanabi remained and the two ANBU facing her were both worse for wear.

"Hanabi!" a desperate voice came from the sidelines, then she found herself crash-tackled to the ground by one Sarutobi Konohamaru. Hanabi squealed and wrapped her arms around his neck, delivering passionate kisses all over his face. He was caught off guard at first but was quick to return the display of affection.

"Hey! Get a room, you two!" Naruto yelled, as the two ANBU attempted to disentangle the young pair. They finally managed to separate them and once Konohamaru was on his feet, he bent down and scooped Hanabi up, bridal style. Before he could attempt to follow Naruto's advice, he was firmly escorted back to the hospital.

As Naruto considered this latest turn of events, Hinata and Hana knelt to untie Kiba.

"Looks like you're off the hook." Hana grinned as she helped her brother sit up.

"Lucky me." Kiba grinned halfheartedly.

"N-Not quite."

"Huh?"

Before Kiba could blink, Hinata slapped him across the face. Although she hadn't put much strength into it, the sound of palm hitting cheek was still loud enough to catch everyone's attention.

"Hinata! What was that for?" Kiba whined, holding his cheek, where a red handprint was quickly appearing over his face marking.

"M-mind your own b-business next t-time!" Hinata huffed as Hana broke out into raucous laughter. Even Naruto smirked, though it was replaced by a nervous smile when Hinata stood up and faced him.

But that was as far as her courage took her. A blush blossomed across her face and her fingers started fidgeting as she stared down at her feet. Naruto gulped, unsure what to do next.

"Aren't you going to do something?" Hana whispered.

"I'm minding my business." Kiba muttered, crossing his arms in defiance.

Naruto caught sight of the gesture and squared his shoulders. He took a deep breath, let it out then grinned. Hana and Kiba eyed him warily, while Hinata glanced up then quickly back at her toes. Then Naruto ran over to Hinata, swept her up into his arms, and disappeared over the top of the buildings.

"What was that about?"

_

* * *

_Sakura and Tenten separated from Shizune in the foyer, and continued on to the ward where Sasuke and Neji had been placed. Tsunade was just leaving their room as the two girls arrived.

"How is he?" they both called as they ran up.

"They'll be fine in a couple of hours. No, you can't go in. They need to rest." And she closed the door of the room firmly.

Sakura moved over to the window and looked in. She could see Sasuke was sleeping calmly. She glanced over to the other bed as Tenten stepped up behind her.

"Why isn't he restrained?" Tenten shrieked, pushing passed Sakura towards the window. "Don't you know what he put me through? How do you know he'll be back to normal?"

"Calm down, Tenten. Tsunade knows what she's doing." Sakura said soothingly, but her platitudes fell on deaf ears.

"He's gonna wake up and then I'll never escape!" Tenten whispered to herself. She turned an anxious look on Tsunade, "Can't you strap him in? At least until he wakes up and we know he's normal?"

"The antidote worked quite quickly, Tenten. You have nothing to worry about."

"Send me on a mission! Please?"

"What? No! You need to face this fear, Tenten. Neji won't hurt you."

"You don't know that!" Tenten shrieked as she wheeled away and disappeared through a window.

Inside the room, Neji twitched and turned his head.

_

* * *

**In Interrogation…**_

"So, you thought you'd get away with it, huh?" Anko circled the man sitting at the table.

"Honestly, I didn't think…" he began.

"Silence! Thought you could do what you liked and there would be no consequences?" She changed directions.

"But it wasn't really my fault…" He was cut off as she slammed her hands down on the table in front of him.

"Shut it! I don't want to hear your excuses!" She screamed in his face, as snakes appeared, writhing on the table and inching closer to his face.

"Then what do you want?" a third voice interrupted.

Anko jerked upright and the snakes disappeared.

"Ibiki."

"I hardly think that Kotetsu deserved to be interrogated by you."

"Then why is he here?" Anko said, smirking down at the terrified Chunin.

"He is here to be interrogated, that is true. But not by you. This interrogation is below your abilities."

"Hmph." Anko sat on the edge of the table and crossed her arms.

"Didn't the Hokage send you home?"

Anko's mouth thinned and her nostrils flared, but she said nothing.

"Personal problems?"

"Not at work." She stated coolly.

"You aren't supposed to be here, though."

"If you don't want me to interrogate this little bastard, who can I interrogate?"

"No one."

"What?"

"Go home, Anko. That's an order."

Grumbling darkly, Anko stood up from the table and stormed over to the door. She yanked it opened, threw a death glare over her shoulder at both men, stalked through and slammed it behind her. They could hear her yells as she repeatedly punched the opposite wall. In fact, everyone in interrogation could hear her. The two bandits, who had been delivered by Naruto's clones, huddled together in their cell and prayed that that sound was from another inmate that they would never see. The four other men, brought in for dalliances with Hyuga girls, prayed that Anko was taking out her anger on the Kabuto/Orochimaru creature. The Kabuto/Orochimaru creature stirred in his sleep, before smiling and remembering happy times in the Sound bases where such noises were quite common.

Having created a fist sized hole in the wall and torn open her hand, Anko straightened, breathing deeply to calm herself enough to walk over to the hospital.

"Anko? What happened?" Shizune asked as she rushed over to the troubled woman.

"I want Kakashi. Can I have him yet?"

Shizune felt Anko's forehead then clicked her tongue. She called over her shoulder for some orderlies and led Anko into one of the treatment rooms. "Let's patch this up first." She said gently.

"Don't worry about the hand. It's nothing. Where's Kakashi?"

"He's sleeping. You know how lazy he is." Shizune attempted some levity. It failed. Anko glared at the wall as the medic continued to treat her self-inflicted wounds. Ordinarily she would have shaken off the medic's concern and stormed off for whatever it was she was after. Except that the last time she hadn't sat still while Shizune was working on her, she'd woken up in a hospital bed two days later.

"Anko, I sent you home."

"So did Ibiki." Anko muttered, as Tsunade stepped into the room.

"Pardon?"

"Yes, my lady, you did." Anko replied stiffly.

"Why are you here?"

"I was helping. Aren't I trustworthy enough to help out when the village is in danger?" Anko snapped.

"That isn't an issue." Tsunade replied, a frown etched on her face.

"I'm not my sensei!" Anko yelled, her eyes glazing over, "I won't betray the village just because _he's_ here!"

Tsunade nodded to Shizune and Anko fell forward. The orderlies caught her and lay her back on the bed. Shizune put away her needles and finished treating Anko's hand.

"Transfer her to the psych ward and keep her under watch. She may need counseling before this is over."

"Was it just because of Kabuto?" asked Shizune.

"Oh, that is definitely an issue she has to face." Tsunade answered, then she smirked a little, "but that wasn't why she did that to her hand."

"Then why?"

"Who did she ask for?"

"Well, Kakashi. But I don't…"

"The man must have some serious skills."

"Oh!"

"Hmm. Feeling sorry you turned him down?"

Shizune pulled a face, "Not if it could reduce Anko to this!"

Tsunade laughed, "Indeed."

* * *

Sakura quietly opened the door to find Sasuke sitting on his bed and putting on his sandals.

"Sasuke? Where are you going?"

"I'm going home." He answered shortly.

"But…" she looked away from his cold glare, to find that Neji's bed was empty too. "You aren't supposed to be up! Tsunade has to give you the all-clear before you're allowed to leave."

Sasuke just stared at her.

"Sasuke, what's wrong?"

"Hn." He pushed passed her and headed to the door.

"Sasuke?" Sakura grabbed his arm and he stopped. "Talk to me!"

"I did to talk to you!" Sasuke growled as he faced her. "I shared my true feelings with you and you thought it was a joke."

"No I didn't!" She responded indignantly. Sasuke eyed her. "I didn't! I thought something was wrong with you! And it was!"

"Hn."

"Come on, Sasuke. Face facts. You aren't the type to walk up and say" Sakura paused, "and say…"

"What?" Sasuke challenged her.

"What you said." Sakura finished weakly.

"That doesn't change the emotion behind it."

"How was I supposed to know you meant it?" Sakura asked, throwing her hands in the air in exasperation, "You were acting weird! You were crying!"

Sasuke crossed his arms and glared down at her. "So?"

"You aren't usually that emotional." Sakura stammered, "You were so weak…"

An expression of surprise appeared on his face, quickly replaced by one of calculation, "So."

"Sasuke?"

"You don't like me being emotional or weak? Hmmm."

"Sasuke?" Sakura didn't know what he was thinking, really, but it didn't bode well.

"Your bedside manner is appalling, Sakura. We'll start there."

"What?" Sakura squawked. Next thing she knew he'd heaved her over his shoulder and walked out the room.

"Sasuke! Put me down! Right now!"

"Hn." He ignored the curious looks they were attracting and walked through the foyer toward the front door.

"Don't 'Hn' me, Sasuke! Just what do you think you're doing?"

They left the hospital and Sasuke jumped up onto the roof of the nearest building.

"Where are we going? Sasuke? Sasuke!"

Sasuke shifted his hold as she started kicking and struggling. He smirked as she gasped.

"Sasuke! Remove your hand this instant!"

"Stop moving or I'll drop you."

"Stop groping me in public!"

"We'll be in private soon enough."

"Sasuke!" she gasped again.

"Sakura." He answered as he landed in front of his house. He opened the door and they both disappeared inside.

* * *

Two streets over, Neji watched an apartment.

He'd been watching that dwelling for the last hour. Occasionally his byakugan flickered on and his face tightened. She hadn't moved. Not once. For an hour.

He'd been in there before. He knew where she was.

He'd also heard her at the hospital, so he knew why she was hiding.

Since he was her training partner and had been on several missions with her, he knew she'd have set traps all round her apartment to prevent him from entering. Having been caught in one earlier in the day, he knew he couldn't disregard her traps as escapable.

What he didn't know was how to approach her, and more importantly, how to apologize.

He looked down at his feet. There was a bouquet of flowers lying on the ground. He created a clone and sent it across to the door, carrying the flowers. He watched with his byakugan as the clone knocked on the door and was dispersed by a trap, leaving the flowers to fall on the doorstep.

He cringed as he gained the short memories of the clone and heard her panicked shriek at the knock.

"I am so sorry, Tenten."

* * *

Tenten was curled up in the middle of her living room. She'd strung traps all around her apartment, at each door and window to prevent anyone from entering. Then, despite her ninja training, she'd created a fort in the middle of the floor by overturning her lounge and coffee table and pulling them together.

She could still sense him out there so it must have been a clone at the door. She shuddered. Then she stopped.

He wouldn't have knocked if he wasn't back to normal. He wouldn't have used a clone. He didn't earlier. He just came charging in, so certain that he could beat her. Was this a new strategy? Or had the antidote worked like Tsunade and Sakura said it would?

The curiosity took control and Tenten pushed her coffee table out a bit so she could slip through the gap. Still being cautious, in case it was a trap, Tenten crawled over to her doorway and peered through the curtain in the little strip of window next to the door.

Her heart thudded in her chest when she caught sight of him. He was staring intently at the door.

_No, not at the door. Damn the byakugan! He's looking at me!_

She pulled back, and he moved.

Tenten leaned forward as curiosity caught her again. He knelt in the alleyway across from her home and bowed. She brushed the curtain out of the way, to see him clearer. He was saying something. _What is he saying?_

In her haste to open the door and find out, Tenten completely forgot about her traps. As soon as the handle started to turn, three different traps went off.

Across the road, Neji reactivated his byakugan as an explosion blew open Tenten's front door.

"Tenten?" He raced across to her apartment, just as she crawled out, coughing and gagging from the smoke and…

"A pepper bomb?"

"It's effective." Tenten tried to huff but sneezed instead.

"Tenten? I'm really sorry." Neji said as he helped her up.

"So that's what you were saying." She sneezed again.

"Oh."

"Yeah, I opened the door to see what you were saying and forgot to disengage my traps. Happy now? You're still better than me." Tenten muttered as she tried to brush the dirt and debris off her clothes.

"Tenten, I don't think about you like that." He said quietly.

Tenten stiffened and began backing away.

"Tenten, please, don't."

"Neji, I don't want to hurt you." _But I will!_ The unspoken words hung between them.

"I'm sorry, Tenten." He said and he stepped away from her. "I'm sorry I caused you such distress. I won't bother you anymore."

He turned to walk away, but before he could, she called his name softly.

"Neji? Did you mean it?"

He looked back at her in question.

"Did you mean it when you said that you loved me?"

His face softened and he slowly nodded his head. Then the questioning look returned and he stepped closer as she put her hands over her face.

"Tenten, what is it? Are you alright?"

Her shoulders shook, but he couldn't tell if she really was sobbing or laughing.

"Tenten?"

"Neji, you idiot!" She cried as she threw her arms around his neck, "Why'd you have to wait 'til you were on drugs to tell me that?"

* * *

The next morning dawned on the peaceful village and Hiashi woke with a headache, assorted sore muscles, and a feeling of foreboding. Everything seemed much worse when the Hokage strode into the room.

"Where am I?" he asked, trying to play the disorientated patient in the hopes that whatever had happened could be shrugged off.

Unfortunately for him, it didn't work.

"You are in the hospital, which you know very well, so don't try to play that card." Tsunade replied with a stern look. "Given the circumstances, we will be waiving the punishments. But Hiashi, your family has caused quite a lot of trouble in the last twenty four hours!"

"What happened?" Hiashi groaned, holding his head.

"We were infiltrated and sabotaged. It was biological warfare. The eye drops we distributed two weeks ago were laced with a potent cocktail of drugs. They caused chemical imbalances within your system."

"So, I _was_…"

"Dancing in the main street of the village? Making a fool of yourself? Flirting with the ladies like a young buck?"

"I what?" Hiashi cried out in panic, "I don't remember that!"

Tsunade chuckled, "You're right. I made that last one up. Although, you are quite the dancer. I'd say there are a few ladies out there with their eye on you now."

"Oh no." He dropped back on the bed and covered his face. _This nightmare is never ending!_ Then he sat bolt upright.

"What about my daughters? Are they alright? Neji? Did anything happen to them?"

Tsunade gave him a calculating look, as if trying to decide how to break bad news.

"What happened?" he demanded, sounding more like himself.

"The drugs seemed to affect them differently to you. We're unsure whether it was age or usage but while you and the elders of your clan were dancing, the youngsters were feeling… frisky."

"OH NO! NOT MY DAUGHTERS!" Hiashi began shaking, then he leapt off the bed toward the window, ready to find and destroy any young man who laid a hand on his daughters. Tsunade simply watched as his back seized up and he crumpled to the floor.

"Just what do you think you are doing?" she asked, still watching him.

His only reply was an agonized groan and she moved over to help him up. She led him back to the bed and forced him down onto his stomach. Then she began a brutally gentle massage, each of his twinges and gasps causing a smug smirk to appear on her face.

"You worry unnecessarily." She said as she finished. "No, don't get up. You need to let them recover."

"Why shouldn't I worry? My daughters are…"

"Not in any trouble. Both were admitted to the hospital before you finished your dancing."

Hiashi tried again to rise, as panic set in.

"You aren't going anywhere." Tsunade said sternly, holding him down with one hand. "Hanabi attacked and attempted to capture Inuzuka Kiba and was restrained by him and brought to the hospital. He went to find Hinata and brought her in as well."

"What did he do? Why would Hanabi attack him? That little…"

"You owe that boy for preserving your daughters' dignity. So don't think you're going to leave here and tear him a new one. Or you may find yourself facing Tsume."

Hiashi blanched at the thought. As with most adult males in the Leaf, he had a healthy respect for Inuzuka Tsume, which was accompanied by the need to keep a healthy distance.

"Hiashi, it may seem difficult to believe, but your daughters were the dominant ones yesterday. The young men should not be faulted for their behaviour during the course of the day." _Although, all bets are off as to what they've been doing since then._ _Best not to mention that_. "If it makes you feel better, what they did was tame compared to their cousins."

There was a sinking feeling in his stomach, as Hiashi considered all the possible things that could have occurred. He dropped his head onto his pillow to muffle his sobs. He was not looking forward to going home.

* * *

Kakashi sat up and looked around the room.

He snatched his mask off the bedside table and put it on, followed by his headband. Then he looked around for his clothes.

All he found was a freshly cleaned black bathrobe, with fluffy pink lining and a pair of fluffy pink slippers.

"NOOOOOOOOO!"

* * *

Kakashi sat up and looked around the room.

He snatched his mask off the bedside table and put it on, followed by his headband. Then he looked around for his clothes, sighing in relief when he found his usual attire in the drawer.

He was pulling on his shirt when the curtain surrounding his bed was pulled back and Shizune walked in.

"You're up. How do you feel?"

"I'm fine." He answered in a tired voice, "Shizune, how did I get here?"

Shizune pulled out a torch and shined it in his eyes, then proceeded to check him over. "You don't remember what happened yesterday?"

Kakashi swayed alarmingly, "You mean, _that actually happened?_"

_Oh dear. That can't be good._ Shizune thought as she steadied him. "What did you do yesterday?"

"I don't want to remember." Kakashi moaned, his eye covered by his hand.

"Well, I'm afraid you have no choice." _Though I don't want to know the details._

He looked up at her in question.

"You do remember appearing on my doorstep yesterday morning?"

"Yes." Kakashi said quietly.

"And then you met Anko?"

"Yes." He murmured mournfully.

"And after?"

Kakashi whimpered, and Shizune grew more concerned. _Maybe the antidote didn't work. Since when did Kakashi whimper?_

"Kakashi?"

"Any chance of a long mission out of the village?" Kakashi asked hopefully, trying to hide behind his usual façade.

"You're recovering from a drug-induced…"

"So that's a 'no'?"

"What did you do to Anko?" Shizune blurted out, her curiosity taking over.

Kakashi blinked at her, "Whatever do you mean?"

"She's been placed in the psych ward, under supervision, restraint and sedation."

"Why?" he asked, though he had a pretty good idea.

"I think you know, Kakashi. Tell us so we can treat her."

"This is why I read _Icha Icha_." Kakashi sighed.

"What is?" Shizune asked, hoping he wasn't talking about what she thought he was talking about.

"I think you know, Shizune." He sighed, "I'm never going to live this down."

Shizune blushed slightly from embarrassment, then she paled. "You're addictive?" she squeaked.

Kakashi chuckled, "Not really, but the sharingan has its uses."

Shizune gasped and went paler. "Oh dear! What about Sakura?"

Kakashi froze, "What about Sakura?"

* * *

The door to Sasuke's house opened, and a very smug Sasuke stretched. He walked out and collected his mail. Then he turned and walked back in.

"Sakura? It's morning."

"Someone save me!" Sakura grumbled, rolling over and hugging her pillow.

Sasuke sat down next to her and leaned in. Sakura rolled over and was out the door as quickly as possible. He took her place on the bed and chuckled as he heard the front door slam and Sakura ran down the street screaming.

"She'll be back."

* * *

**Sorry about the delay. So this is the final chapter. Fair warning, I consider this story complete. However, if there is something you think needs to be followed up, a situation that you don't believe to be fully resolved, feel free to tell me and I'll see if I can come up with another chapter for you.**

**Thanks for the reviews, _mistressinwaiting, PaulRap Raptor, y-in-flame, Helga4ever, Yuuki-Hime, lolhell, eternalsmiles, _and_ Faire101_. I'm glad you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. :D**

**Author's Note: Due to several requests, there will be one more chapter of this story. That is all.  
**


	5. And they all lived happily ever after

**Chapter Five: And, apart from a few incidents, they all lived happily ever after.**

* * *

The general populace of Konoha went about their business as usual, despite the sudden appearance of a half-naked Haruno Sakura running down the street away from the Uchiha manor. There were a few rubber-neckers but, for the most part, she was ignored. After all, weirder things had happened the day before, and it was bound to happen sooner or later, although some were disappointed that Sasuke was not out chasing her. It would have spiced up the gossip a little.

Something that did catch people's attention was a small figure seen darting between buildings and over roofs. Small sobs and quiet wails were heard as the person crossed the city from a high rise apartment building towards the Clan residences. Everyone who caught sight of said person was quick to lose their smiles and there was quite a lot of dark muttering.

That person was Hyuga Hinata.

And, yes, she was crying.

Also correct was the belief that Naruto was involved somehow.

* * *

Hiashi arrived home from the hospital, having been discharged and forcibly removed by Tsunade, in order to have him take charge for his clan's actions. He had already waved off his assistant by saying he hadn't quite recovered, and was making his slow way through the estate towards his family's quarters. His only warning was a muffled cry before Hinata came charging down the hallway and he received a gentle fist to the stomach.

Hinata wheeled around, crashing into the wall and taking out a large chunk of masonry with her shoulder. She fell backwards to the floor and stared up at her father. He was leaning against the opposite wall, holding his stomach and grimacing. She bit her lip and looked down to her feet, a tiny whimper escaping as one hand went up to hold her injury.

"Hinata? What on earth…" Hiashi wheezed, a frown firmly entrenched on his face.

"F-Father…uh N-Naruto…" Hinata couldn't continue as her emotions overflowed. Tears streamed down her cheeks, and she hid her face in her hands.

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?" Hiashi thundered, looming over his daughter's distraught body.

"NOTHING!" Hinata yelled back, shooting to her feet. "THAT'S THE PROBLEM!"

Hiashi fell back onto the wall, utterly confused and feeling winded all over again. Firstly, because no one ever yelled at him, secondly, because it was Hinata yelling at him, and thirdly, because of what she said.

"What… What do you mean?"

However, his questions went unanswered, due to the fact that Hinata had run away again, still crying.

* * *

"Hinata?"

"Hinata?"

"Hinata?"

"Hinata? Where'd you go?"

"Do you hear that?" asked Genma snidely, as he walked up and dispersed two Naruto clones by banging their heads together.

"What is it?" Aoba asked, knocking over another clone. The other clones turned and regarded the three Jounin with annoyance.

"That would be the call of the Naruto, _minipervertis idioticus_. His usual habitat: the Ramen shop." Raidou replied.

"HEY!"

"WHY AREN'T YOU HELPING ME?"

"WHERE'S HINATA?"

The clones quickly surrounded the three Jounin, shouting their questions in loud voices.

"Where's the real one?" muttered Raidou, as he and Genma grimly dispersed a few more clones.

"It would be the one that doesn't disperse, correct?" Aoba stated. His two friends looked over at him and malicious grins spread across their faces. They turned and winked at each other, before attacking the clones with gusto. It wasn't long before the real Naruto ran up.

"What's the deal here? I'm looking for Hinata!" he shouted indignantly.

"And that wouldn't have anything to do with her running away from your house, crying her eyes out?"

Naruto's anger drained from his face. "She was crying?" he asked, astonished by the news.

A look of determination swept over his face. "Where did she go? I have to find her!"

The three older men looked down at him disapprovingly. Making a woman cry was a big no-no in their books. They were _not_ going to help him.

Naruto searched their faces for any clue or sign of aid. He found none.

"Fine."

He hurried away, still calling her name.

* * *

Kakashi stood at the memorial stone in silence.

Internal thoughts led a merry dance around his head. He was so confused he wasn't even reading his book.

He thought yesterday was strange; today was weirder.

He'd left his house at the usual hour, about eleven thirty, and headed into town for some groceries. He'd only gone five metres from his door when he caught sight of his neighbour. His cheerful greeting to the old lady had been returned with a sour look.

He'd stopped at Ichiraku's for some lunch but left again, quite hastily. One look at him had sent Ayame fleeing into the kitchen and the loud roar that followed could only have been Teuchi.

Deciding to skip lunch altogether, Kakashi continued on into the market district. But every woman he passed turned their nose up at him. Mothers hurried their children away. Young men shot him sceptic glances while old men laughed openly.

Usually this wouldn't bother him in the slightest. At least that's what he told himself.

But then, he'd never experienced this behaviour before. At least, not from everyone. Young men often sent sceptical glances his way: he was the great Copy-Nin Hatake Kakashi, after all.

No, this was new. And he wasn't sure what to make of it just yet.

* * *

KNOCK KNOCK

Sasuke opened the door to find Naruto on the doorstep. The hopeful look in his eyes faded and was replaced by one of annoyance.

"What do you want, Naruto?"

"I know you're probably really busy crying yourself into a stupor, but I need your help! Have you seen Hinata?"

Sasuke regarded him coolly for a moment before taking one step back and closing the door in his face.

"You bastard! I hope all your tomatoes go rotten!"

Naruto didn't run fast enough.

* * *

KNOCK KNOCK

Kiba opened the door to find Naruto on the doorstep, with a fat lip and a black eye.

"Hey, Kiba. You're good at finding things, right? Can you help me find Hinata?"

Kiba didn't bother waiting a moment before swiftly closing the door in his face.

"What kind of friend are you?" Naruto demanded as he pounded on the door, "Don't you care about Hinata's happiness?"

Kiba was fighting an internal battle as to whether he should help out or not, when Naruto made up his mind.

"You owe me since you stopped us last time!"

Naruto fell to the floor as the door opened suddenly. Then his face met Kiba's foot and he went flying.

"I'm minding my own business!" Kiba yelled and slammed the door.

* * *

"Lady Tsunade!"

Tsunade turned from the window.

"Shizune! Why must you always disturb me?"

Shizune marched over to her mentor and snatched the cup of sake away from her. "There is still paperwork to be done!"

"Not until the reports come in." Tsunade replied, snatching the cup back. "And I'll write mine when Hiashi's arrives."

"Why his?" Shizune asked, attempting to take the cup again.

"Because it's going to take the longest."

Shizune stopped reaching for the cup and looked at her quizzically, "What haven't you told us?"

"I'm disappointed in you, Shizune. I thought your training would have informed you."

"I don't follow."

"It's simple, really. The eye drops were a combination of hormones and chemicals, correct?"

"Well, yes…"

"And they were administered over the course of two weeks?"

"Yes… oh!" Shizune paled as the significance of the revelation sank in.

"Exactly. The antidote stopped the bleeding and prevented any further damage but the hormone imbalances are not as quick to disperse." Tsunade explained with a smirk as she turned back to the window, "Yesterday was just the beginning. You ain't seen nothing yet."

"How long are they going to affected?" Shizune was both worried for the afflicted ninja (but mostly for Sakura) and annoyed by Tsunade's blasé attitude to the matter, (And for goodness sake, what about Sakura?)

Tsunade waved her hand around, "A day, a month, who knows, it could be anything really." She threw back the sake and grinned as she regarded the bottle. "Yes, that should make things interesting. Shizune, I'm going to make up a special medicine. Will you see that it's delivered?"

Shizune pulled back, "What are you thinking my lady?", not entirely sure that she wanted to know.

"Shizune, do you remember back when we first arrived?"

"In the village?" she asked uncertainly.

"Hmm, and Rock Lee ran off to help Naruto?"

The colour that had just returned to Shizune's face drained away again, "No, my lady! You mustn't!"

"Spoilsport!" Tsunade muttered with annoyance. "Shizune, this is for the greater good!"

"No it isn't! This is for your own entertainment!"

"And if I'm sufficiently entertained, the greater good has been achieved." Tsunade declared righteously. Shizune remained unconvinced. "I'll send you on a mission with you know who…"

Shizune turned away to resist the temptation.

"Undercover, as a couple."

She closed her eyes and covered her ears.

KNOCK KNOCK

"This had better be important." Tsunade growled in annoyance, storming over to the door and throwing it open.

"Granny Tsunade, have you seen Hinata? I can't find her anywhere!"

* * *

"I saw this coming." Ino sighed.

"Really?" asked Choji in surprise.

"Of course she didn't. She's just being dramatic." Shikamaru muttered.

"No, really! I knew Sasuke would be trouble from the moment he walked in the room."

"At the academy? I highly doubt that." Shikamaru murmured, then dodged as Ino tried to slap his arm.

"Didn't you have a massive crush on him then?" Choji asked.

"Oh no. I just wanted everyone to think I did." Ino responded confidently. Her two team mates shared a knowing look.

"You liar." Sakura muttered. Hinata whimpered.

Ino stepped in front of Choji and he stopped. She grabbed Sakura's face and turned it to see her properly.

"Forehead, don't make me reconsider helping you." She flounced away, beckoning for her team mates to follow. Sharing another look, Shikamaru and Choji trudged after her, the two distraught kunoichi in their arms.

* * *

In a dark cell, five men sat disconsolately contemplating their situation.

"Hey Izumo? Do you think they've forgotten about us?"

"We can only hope."

"Why would we hope that, you idiots? Don't you know what that means?"

"Yeah, we could be stuck down here forever, slowly dying from starvation, forced to eat each other for food."

"I only meant, what we did, not us entirely." Kotetsu squeaked, "You don't think they'd really forget about us, do you?"

They waited in anxious silence, for what seemed like hours, before the door opened and food was delivered. The look the guard gave them answered Kotetsu's question, and suddenly the small dark cell didn't seem so bad.

* * *

"Why, exactly, am I here?" Kurenai asked, as Choji and Shikamaru ran off with her son.

"Because you're a woman, and a kunoichi and I need your help." Ino replied as she finished plumping the cushions on her lounge and let Sakura fall back against them. The young medic was alternating between glares and starry eyes as she slumped on the lounge, her feet tied and her hands bound behind her. Next to her, Hinata let out muffled sobs.

"I know, Hinata, but if I take off the gag, Naruto might find you."

Hinata's eyes went wide before she wailed, turning her head to hide it behind Sakura's shoulder.

"Ino, I don't understand what you're planning to do, but I think this is abduction. And deprivation of liberty."

"Nonsense," Ino replied, waving off her concerns. "They _want_ to be here. They _need_ my help."

"How does that require the rope and gags?" Kurenai inquired.

"They're in denial." Ino answered, a smug smirk on her face as she regarded her captives, I mean friends in desperate, _desperate_ need.

"Uh huh. Tell me, when was your last psych exam?"

"Oh, Daddy checked me out this morning. After all that work yesterday, removing the location of the village from those thugs, a psych exam is essential."

"And he couldn't tell you had psychotic tendencies?" Kurenai asked innocently. Sakura snorted in laughter.

"No, Daddy said I'm his sweet, innocent angel, just the same as always." Ino replied in complete sincerity. Ignoring the shock and disbelief on their faces, Ino continued, "And I'm positive he didn't mean I had to stay in bed _all_ day. But we aren't here to talk about me, although I can understand why you would want to. We're here because Sakura gave something up last night and Hinata didn't."

Kurenai's eyebrows shot up in surprise and she turned to face the two younger women. Sakura was glaring at Ino and making muffled yells and Hinata was sobbing into Sakura's hair.

Ino clapped her hands, "Now, now. If you want to say something, you'll have to raise your hand and wait to be called upon."

Sakura let out another round of muffled profanities, causing Kurenai and Hinata to wince while Ino smirked.

"Ino, I think Sakura has something to say."

"Oh, very well then. Forehead, permission to speak." Ino said as she removed the gag.

"You don't know what you're talking about, PIG! I gave _nothing_ up last night!"

"You mean, he took it?" Ino gasped.

"No!" Sakura scoffed, "I mean, we didn't do anything!"

"Sakura, having sex is not nothing."

Sakura let out a frustrated growl, "We didn't have sex!"

"You didn't?"

"No!"

"Then why were you running down the street in nothing but Sasuke's shirt?"

Sakura's face went bright red and she mumbled something incoherent.

"Sakura, we need you to say that a little louder this time." Kurenai encouraged gently.

"I lost my clothes in his house." She repeated in a small voice.

"You lost your clothes?" Kurenai asked in consternation, at the same time as Ino burst out, "So you did have sex!"

"No!" Sakura stated. "When we got to his house yesterday,"

* * *

**Flashback

* * *

**

_Sasuke walked into the front hallway of his house and kicked the door closed. Then he set Sakura gently down on the floor and looked down at her. She was fussing with her clothes and her hair, so she didn't realise he was leaning in until his lips touched hers._

_She pulled back in shock, but he followed, pressing her into the wall as he continued his assault on her mouth. When he moved his kisses across her face and down her neck, she took in several deep breaths. There was a heat building inside her and part of her wanted him to continue. But the sensible part was becoming increasingly aware of smells, aches and strains._

"_Sasuke?"_

"_Hmm…"_

"_Sasuke, stop."_

"_But why?" He pulled back to regard her._

"_I smell."_

_She watched, both somewhat amused and horrified, as his nostrils flared._

"_Hn."_

_She glared up at him. "Don't 'hn' me, Sasuke. While you were crying the hospital, I was battling for our safety. It's my right to smell a bit ripe."_

_His eyes narrowed at the reference to his actions at the hospital, then he smirked._

"_Shower?"_

"_By myself." Sakura declared primly._

"_Well, that's no fun."_

"_One thing you should know, Sasuke. Grooming is rarely fun."_

"_I'll remember that the next time you want me to pay for a trip to a hot spring."_

_Sakura folded her arms and scowled at him. Sasuke's face went blank._

"_Fine. Have your boring shower." Sasuke led the way to a bathroom. Sakura followed, quietly wondering if the antidote had actually worked. She went in and closed the door, waiting until she heard his footsteps walk away before she began to undress._

* * *

**Present

* * *

**

"So you went for a shower? That's it?"

"Well, when I came out, he wanted to start something but I told him I was too tired."

"And he bought that?"

Sakura mumbled something and Ino reached over and yanked her hair.

"Stop mumbling!"

"I threw a tantrum, okay?"

Sakura rolled her eyes and huffed as Ino burst into hysterical giggles. While waiting for her friend to regain her composure, Sakura thought back over the events of the previous night.

"I think his house is haunted." Sakura murmured.

"Why do you think that?"

"It felt like there were hands running over my body the entire time I was in the shower and I didn't hear the door open but my clothes were gone when I was finished."

"Oh my!" Ino gasped.

"What?"

Ino and Kurenai shared concerned looks.

"Sakura, I think Sasuke got you with his sharingan."

"You mean, he was there _the whole time_?" Sakura shrieked, her face bright red.

"What else happened?" Ino asked, completely captivated by the whole occurrence. Unfortunately, Sakura was in no state to continue with her narrative. So Ino, completely dissatisfied, turned to Hinata.

"Your turn, Hinata. What happened with Naruto?"

Hinata jolted, turning wide, embarrassed eyes on Ino. Then she whimpered.

"Come on. It can't be worse than fainting every time he walks passed you."

Hinata continued whimpering as Ino untied the gag.

"So, what happened?"

* * *

**Flashback

* * *

**

_Naruto stopped outside his apartment and gently lowered Hinata to the ground. He unlocked the door and ushered her inside. Hinata looked around Naruto's apartment curiously. It was small and a bit messy but there was an air of homeliness and Hinata was able to feel comfortable. She sighed happily._

"_Just wait here, Hinata. I don't want to get Kabuto drool on you. I won't be long. Make yourself at home." And he darted away through a side door. Within a minute, Hinata could hear the shower running. She sat down at the kitchen table and glanced around the room._

_Then the dishes caught her eye._

_She frowned, there were dishes piled up around the sink, which was full of murky water. She turned to regard the door Naruto had disappeared through._

_He was singing. _

_In the shower._

_Hinata smiled. He wasn't very good._

_Figuring that he'd be a while, Hinata cautiously approached the sink. _

_Twenty minutes later he was still in the shower and the dishes were done. She ventured out into the lounge room and found a similar state of disarray. It was clothes this time, mostly shirts and jackets. As she began tidying up, she came across an item that confused her._

_It was a bright orange, and looked way too small for Naruto's size. She fumbled with it a bit before finally holding it up and figuring out what it was._

_It was a pair of his pants, from years ago. _

_And there was a large, clumsily done patch in the seat._

"_Ah, Hinata! I see you want to get into my pants."_

_Hinata whirled round to face Naruto, who was in the process of putting on his shirt. Instinctively, she hugged the pants to her chest, as she gasped._

"_Don't worry." He grinned, "They'd probably fit you better, anyway."

* * *

_

**Present

* * *

**

"Then she fainted."

Tsunade frowned. "I'm disappointed with you, Naruto. So much promise."

"But I don't know why she fainted. I mean, yesterday…" he was cut off by Shizune who was asking Tsunade what was wrong.

"Two years, absolutely wasted on this young fool. I bet even the Sarutobi brat got laid last night."

"My lady!" Shizune was mortified.

"Look, even the pervy sage couldn't have changed what happened last night." Naruto retorted indignantly, "Besides, that isn't the problem. She ran away and apparently she's crying. Do you know where she is?"

"I have no idea." Tsunade replied.

Shooting an annoyed look at Tsunade over her shoulder, Shizune focussed on Naruto. "Where have you looked?"

Naruto groaned in frustration.

"Where haven't I looked? I sent my clones out into the marketplace but some Jounins went and got rid of them. I knocked at Sakura's door but she wasn't there. I asked Sasuke to help and he beat me up. I asked Kiba for help and he beat me up! Kakashi used his scarecrow distraction on me when I was in the training grounds. I even went into the Aburames' estate! Do you have any idea how creepy that place is? I mean, I like Shino and all but damn, that place is spooky!"

Ignoring Tsunade's ongoing grumbles, Shizune thought about the situation.

"Naruto, did you look at her house?"

Naruto's mouth opened, then he stopped. It snapped shut and a thoughtful look crossed his face.

"Thanks, Shizune! I never thought of that."

"That's alright, Naruto." Shizune replied, a little off-kilter, as he ran out of the room and Tsunade chuckled.

"Ah, Jiraiya, he's just like you."

* * *

Hanabi strolled into the gardens of the Hyuga estate. She'd ditched Konohamaru (quite violently, I might add) and left him whining about mixed messages. Now she wanted a pleasant stroll to regain her centre.

Or a chance to find her cousin doing something foolish.

_Looks like it's Neji._ She smirked at the yells coming from deeper in the garden.

"NO! Neji, for the last time: go back to the hospital!"

She crept closer, peering over a bush to find Neji standing at the base of a tree.

"Tenten, I'm fine. Lady Tsunade gave me the antidote."

Hanabi looked up and saw Tenten perched on a branch, right up the top of the tree.

"Then explain why you tried to feel me up."

Neji bowed his head, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Tenten. We were kissing! It's a natural follow-on. If you don't like it, I won't do it again."

"If you think I'm going to trust you anywhere near my person again…" Tenten muttered.

"You're being ridiculous, Tenten."

"Am I?" she replied coldly.

"Fine, stay in the tree." Neji sank down at the base of the tree, settling into a meditative posture. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

Hanabi watched them silently for a few minutes before giving up in disgust. They remained in silence for another five minutes after she left.

"It's just… after yesterday… you wouldn't stop." Tenten said quietly, as she shifted on the branch.

"I was on drugs, a chemical imbalance."

"Well I wasn't!"

"You know I wouldn't do that normally."

Tenten scoffed, "Explain ten minutes ago then."

"I said I was sorry." Neji replied, a little disgruntled. "You _can_ trust me, Tenten."

"I know." Tenten bit her lip, then moved down a branch.

"Neji?"

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry."

Neji exhaled and leaned back against the tree, tilting his head up to look at her through the branches.

"Tenten, you don't need to apologize."

Tenten climbed down another branch. She hesitated as he continued to watch her. He lowered his head to look out across the garden, activating the byakugan so he could still watch her. He smiled a little as she resumed her descent.

"I can understand your reluctance, Tenten." Neji voice was barely above a whisper. "I promise I won't push you."

"But?"

Neji glanced up to see her crouched on the lowest branch. He stood up and held out his arms, despite the fact that he knew she'd been capable of jumping all the way down without injury. Just as she had known he could have joined her in the highest branches without much effort.

With only a little hesitation, she allowed him to help her to the ground.

"But I feel I can't take all the blame for this situation."

"What?"

"You shouldn't start kissing me unless you expect me to kiss you back."

* * *

"Hanabi, have you seen your sister?"

Hanabi stopped suddenly at the sound of her father's voice. She spun round to face him, dropping into a small bow.

"Enough! Have you seen Hinata?"

"No, father. Not since yesterday."

Her eyes widened slightly as her father visibly shuddered.

"Don't mention…" he began, before composing himself. "Yesterday's events will be ignored. I wish to talk to your sister. Please find her."

Hanabi bowed again and her father nodded and moved away. (Once he was out of sight he rushed, indecorously, for his office, where he hid behind his desk and took several deep breaths. He was filled with shame at the thought of his actions the day before and wished to avoid any of his family members who wanted to discuss said events.)

Hanabi turned away and walked towards the estate gates.

Then she stopped.

And a scary smirk graced her face.

"That is a disturbing sight, you know." A voice stated, the source remaining out of sight.

"Can I help you, sir?"

"I rather hope you can." Replied the disembodied voice.

There was no flicker of surprise as Kakashi dropped from the top of the gate, landing in front of the girl.

"What is it?"

"You seem to know something. I'd like you to share that information."

"I haven't the faintest idea what you're talking about."

"Now, Hanabi. I know for a fact you know what I'm talking about. Why else would the Sarutobi kid pounce on me for stealing your heart?"

Hanabi shrugged, the self-satisfied smirk on her face not budging an inch.

Kakashi sighed, "Very well, you leave me no option…"

Her smirk disappeared as he raised a hand to his headband.

"What are you doing?" she shrieked, covering her eyes and turning away. "I don't want to be addicted to you!"

Kakashi sighed again, walking over to her and crouched in front of her. "Explain how you knew that."

"You won't zap me?"

"You have the byakugan. Does that 'zap' people?"

"Well, no… but it's different…"

Kakashi stared at her with his one eye, then lifted his hand again.

"INO TOLD ME!" Hanabi squealed in a panic, then she clapped both hands over her mouth and stared at him with wide eyes.

"Thank you. Now, go make up with Konohamaru."

Hanabi nodded, still wide-eyed and turned to leave.

"And Hanabi, good girls don't lie."

"What happens to bad girls?"

Kakashi tapped his headband, over his left eye. Hanabi went white as a sheet and hurried away.

* * *

Kakashi disappeared in a puff of smoke as Naruto came running up. He gave an annoyed growl at the sight of the smoke then focussed on his surroundings. He'd never been far into the Hyuga estate (yesterday didn't count since his brain was fogged by hormones) and he wasn't sure where to start looking.

He figured his original approach would work.

The previously quiet Hyuga estate was suddenly full of orange-clad blonds, running all over the place calling for Hinata.

Hiashi raised his head above his desk and stared at the door. Then his brow crinkled as a frown took over his face and he marched over to the door and threw it open.

"UZUMAKI!" he roared and began laying into any clone that came within arm's reach of him.

This had the opposite effect to before. Naruto did not come running to see why his clones were being dispersed. He kept making them, as his determination to find Hinata reached a feverish state.

And all of the new clones began yelling, instead of just calling her name.

After ten minutes of fruitless searching, and after about three hundred clones were destroyed by an enraged Hiashi, Naruto decided that Hinata was not at her house and ran away.

Neji and Tenten poked their heads round the corner of a building and took in the sight of a dishevelled and near-exhausted Hiashi curiously. They then decided that their curiosity was not going to get them killed today, thank you very much, and Neji led Tenten away as quietly as possible.

* * *

KNOCK KNOCK

Ino looked around in shock. Then panic.

"Kurenai, keep them quiet."

"Ino, I think we should…"

"No! I'm not finished yet!"

She raced over to the door and peeked around it into her family shop. Even Kurenai could see her trembles.

Ino pulled her head back round the door and took several deep breaths.

"I know you're in there, Miss Yamanaka!"

Sakura's eyes gleamed with hope as Ino squealed. She covered her mouth as the outer door opened.

Then there was silence.

Cautiously, Ino opened and peered around the door again. Her brow crinkled in bewilderment. There was no one in the shop and the door was closed.

"Looking for someone?" asked a voice by her ear.

"ARGH!" Ino jumped two foot in the air.

"Kakashi, that was mean." Kurenai admonished him from the lounge.

"Kakashi! I'm so glad to see you! Can you untie me please?" Sakura called.

Hinata thought of Naruto and fresh tears trailed down her cheeks.

Kakashi ignored them all, focussing on the gossipmonger in front of him.

"Miss Yamanaka. I hear I am to thank you for the rumours that are flying around the village."

"Oh, um, who told you that?" Ino asked nervously, as she inched away from him.

"A most interesting question. I have one for you: How did you know?"

"Know what, Mr. Hatake? I don't know what you're talking about."

Kakashi sighed and lifted a hand to his headband.

Ino shrieked, dashing across the room and holding Sakura in front of her like a shield.

"Save me, Forehead! You should be immune by now!"

Sakura snorted in contempt, "It doesn't work like that, Pig." Then she muttered under her breath, "So much for your vaunted intelligence."

"What exactly is this rumour?" Kurenai asked, while wiping away Hinata's latest batch of tears.

"The sharingan is addictive!" Ino yelled.

Kurenai eyed her sceptically. "How could it affect you if Kakashi became addicted to it?"

"Not to him! To women!"

"What makes you think that?"

Kakashi folded his arms and glared his one eyed glare at Ino, daring her to repeat the rumour. Ino quailed under the power of that glare.

"Uh, well… its just…" finally she leaned over to Kurenai and whispered in her ear.

She fell backwards when Kurenai began laughing.

"That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard!"

"But Anko's in the psych ward! She tried to kill herself because Shizune didn't let her in to his room!"

"She did not try to kill herself." Sakura stated. "She attacked a wall and ripped her hand open."

Kakashi sighed, while Kurenai smirked over at him.

"Serves you right."

"Hmph."

"But she's in the _psych ward!_ Under supervision! They strapped her to the bed!" Ino protested.

"Ino, this is Anko we're talking about. She should have been admitted for psychoanalysis years ago."

"But…"

Ino was interrupted by another knock on the door. Sai appeared in the doorway.

"Ino, I have another report for you." Then he noticed all the other people in the room, "Oh, hello."

Kakashi sighed, _Of course, it would be Sai. What an idiot!_

"Him? This is your source?" Sakura exclaimed incredulously.

"Well, what's wrong with that? It's part of his training." Ino huffed defensively.

"How is gathering gossip for you a training exercise?" Sakura asked derisively, before turning on Sai. "Why are you going along with this?"

"I can't understand why you are angry." Sai said, confusion evident on his face, "Are you jealous?"

* * *

Naruto kicked a stone along the ground.

"Where could she be?" he asked himself, "I looked everywhere."

He sighed and stopped, looking up and down the street.

"Hinata?" he called forlornly. Sadly, he started walking again. His feet led him to Ichiraku's.

He stopped outside the stall and stared at the counter. _She kissed me there._

Hopeless now, and completely uncaring about food, he walked away.

Then he heard something that raised his hopes.

The sound of Sakura yelling.

_

* * *

My work here is done._ Kakashi thought as he walked out of the room, leaving the hapless Sai to Sakura's mercy (or lack thereof).

Ino tried to calm everyone, but Sai kept saying the wrong things, and the whole situation went downhill after Sakura snapped the ropes holding her hands behind her back. Kurenai managed to pull Hinata out of harms way and was currently untying her frantically.

A deafening whistle was heard. Everyone halted as the shrill noise echoed in the tiny room. Then Ino shoved Sai out through the door and turned on Sakura.

"Forehead! Sasuke!"

Turbulent emotions crossed her face, as Sakura sank to the floor, curling in to a ball, hugging her knees and whimpering.

"Kurenai, don't untie her!"

But Ino's command came too late. Hinata's sobbing had disappeared and she stood, back straight, ready to find Naruto.

Which didn't take long, because just at that moment he came barrelling through the door.

"Hinata!"

"Naruto!"

She took a flying leap and they ended up on the floor amidst a pile of broken vases and spilt flowers.

"Hinata? Where did you go?"

"I'm sorry, Naruto..."

"Why did you leave?"

"Naruto, I…"

"Why were you crying?"

"Stop talking and kiss me!" Hinata demanded. Taking matters into her own hands, she grabbed his head and held it still as she went in for the kill.

"Hinata? Are you okay?" Kurenai asked with real concern, but Ino waved her off.

"This is nothing." She said airily, "You should have seen them yesterday."

Hinata paused and sent Ino an evil glare over her shoulder.

"I mean, gosh, look at the time! Where could Choji be? Where could he be?" And Ino closed the door to the back room.

"Hinata? My clothes are wet."

Hinata turned back to Naruto, who had sat up. He was pulling at his shirt and shifting uncomfortably due to the fact that he was sitting in a nice big puddle. He looked up and met her gaze.

Hinata looked at Naruto.

Naruto looked at Hinata.

They both started laughing.

"You wanna come back to my place?"

"Again?"

"Yeah, but this time, I won't leave you alone."

Hinata blushed a little, then she smiled at Naruto and stood up. He looked up at her in surprise when she held out her hand.

"Come on, Naruto! Your clothes are wet. You should get out of them quickly or you might catch cold."

He grinned as he stood up, "Would you look after me if I got sick?"

Hinata's smile softened and she nodded. She leaned in close and whispered in his ear, "But that doesn't mean you shouldn't get out of your clothes _now_."

_And that is how the Legend of the Orange Streak of Konoha began._

* * *

**Post Script:**

Ino poked her head out and surveyed the shop. She took in the broken vases, the ruined display, the flowers strewn all over the floor, and the ever expanding puddle.

"Whoo! They're gone. Kurenai, did you know that Hinata had psychotic tendencies?"

"I'm sure you're imagining things, Ino. Now, if you're done torturing your friends, I think I'll collect my son and go home."

As luck would have it, Shikamaru and Choji arrived at that very moment. Kurenai met them at the door, took her son out of Shikamaru's arms and bid them all good night. Shikamaru was quick to disappear as well, while poor, hapless Choji was roped into pack-horse duty, again.

"Follow me, Choji. I think it's time Sakura faced her fears."

"Ino, don't you think you've done enough for today? I'm sure your father told you to rest."

Ino stopped, whirling round to face her team mate and raising an admonishing finger to his face.

* * *

Across the street, Shikaku, Inoichi and Chouza sat at cups, gazing out into the falling evening.

"Hey look, it's your _daughter!_" Chouza croaked, nudging Inoichi in the side and almost knocking him off his barstool.

Shikaku muttered, something derogatory about the inability to create sons, into his drink and Inoichi whacked him on the shoulder.

"You guys are just jealous! My daughter can take your sons anytime, anywhere!"

His drinking buddies snorted but Inoichi held his ground.

"See!" he pointed across the street, where Ino had just turned on her heel and walked away, with a cowed Choji following meekly after her, still carrying the whimpering Sakura.

"AHA! Take that!" Inoichi yelled in triumph, before falling backwards off his stool and slumping semi-conscious against the wall.

* * *

KNOCK KNOCK

Sasuke came running through his house towards the front door at the sound of the knock, his heart racing in excitement. He took a moment to calm himself before he opened the door.

"Hi Sasuke. We brought you a present. Be gentle with her." Ino stated happily, stepping aside so that Choji could offer Sakura to him.

Sasuke looked her over; she had her eyes closed tight, she was biting her lip and her hands were curled into fists and pressed to her chest. She curled up as much as she could, considering she was in someone's arms.

"I don't want her if she's like that." Sasuke stated and he stepped back out of the doorway and began closing the door.

Unfortunately (or fortunately, however you want to look at it), Sasuke was not quite quick enough. Sakura launched herself out of Choji's arms at Sasuke, knocking him over onto the floor of his front hallway and landing on his chest.

"You egotistical, self-satisfied prick! How dare you judge me, after your lecherous, perverted actions!" Sakura grabbed his shirt and lifted him, bodily, to snarl in his face, "You will take me, no matter what condition I'm in! I saved your life, buddy. The least you could do is show some fucking gratitude!"

"If you say so!" Sasuke smirked, and they disappeared from the entryway in a cloud of smoke.

Silently, Choji reached out and closed the door.

"Ino, please don't make me come here again."

Ino stood unmoving, her mouth hanging open.

"Ino? Come on, I'll take you home now." Choji began leading her away but she shook off her stupor.

"Home? No, I can't go home!"

"But, why not?"

"My work is not done! I hear Kiba is sulking and I must cheer him up."

"You can count me out, thank you very much."

And they went their separate ways, Ino humming and buzzing with anticipation of all the ways she could cheer Kiba up, and Choji muttering about hormonal teenage girls and wasting his eating time.

* * *

**Post-Post Script:**

KNOCK KNOCK

"Anko, what are you doing here this late?"

"Tsume."

Anko glanced passed her to find Kiba standing in the hallway. Before she could say anything, Ino wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pulled him back into the lounge room, mouthing _Mine!_

"He's a little young for you, don't you think?" Tsume asked, as she stepped outside and closed the door behind her.

"Next best thing." Anko grumbled.

"How'd you get out?"

An evil gleam filled her eyes, as Anko smirked and held up her hand. A snake appeared, coiled around her arm and hissed at Tsume.

"Impressive."

"It's would be more impressive if I could locate…"

"It isn't that hard. He's right behind you."

Anko whirled around at the crashing noise behind her. Kakashi was in a heap on the ground, in the circle of light from a lamp post. He quickly rearranged himself, so he was leaning casually against the post, facing them.

"Yo."

"Yo?"

"Ah, yes… what would you like me to say?"

Anko smirked, "I don't want you to say anything."

Kakashi gulped, "You don't?"

Anko closed in, still smiling evilly, "Well, nothing coherent."

"I think I can manage that." Kakashi replied in a low, husky voice, "But you'll have to scream this time."

"Deal."

"Well, I'll leave you two to it."

And before Tsume had reached the door to her house, the two Jounin had disappeared.

* * *

**Author's Note: Here it is, as requested, another chapter, and hopefully all of the threads are tied up. I'm toying with the idea of an epilogue, so same rule applies, if you think something was unfinished or you just want to force me to drag it out because you love it so damn much, please let me know ;)**

**Thanks go to the following for their reviews: PaulRap Raptor, mistressinwaiting, Yuuki-Hime, ShadowFaux, Faire101, and y-in-flame. It made my day, knowing how much you enjoyed my story.  
**


End file.
